Rate my stress

Ivy League stem grad during GFC - on H1b to this day - family has a history of mental disability Then software engineer at tier-2 prop trading for 9y, max TC 180k - navigated layoffs but survived - got married - spouse has major depression due to career failure for 4y - had first child Then at a tier-2 HF for 4y, max TC 330k - spouse finished masters, switched career - first child diagnosed with autism - spouse started new career and also lost it in 3mo due to pandemic, H4-EAD delays, forced to be a stay at home parent.. but a blessing in disguise for supporting our daughter’s special needs Then joined a startup HF 1y ago, TC 190k - amazing WLB, ok present, promising future - moved to lcol, bought a house, mortgage 3.2k/mo - missed the chance to apply for GC due to job change, PD retrogressed - daughter is unfortunately continuing to be on severe side of the spectrum - contemplated a lot and decided to give siblings to our daughter so she would have a family when we are gone - just had twins.. physically exhausted but very happy about the future - new car, 800/mo - startup is going well but facing crunch, 80% chance and 1y more to see any upside - started interviewing to mitigate the dreaded 20% scenario Expenses/costs as of today - 100k in 401k - 60k debt (cards, loans) - paycheck to paycheck - financially supporting family back home .. 800/mo EDIT1: of all these things, my daughter put many things in perspective and I am grateful for that. She takes most of my focus than anything at this point. Those parents, esp with special needs children, hopefully would understand this. But please provide any constructive guidance if you can EDIT2: Thanks for some nice tips on health, spending mgmt, state benefits and overall encouragement from majority of you! Life over ladders!! I removed some specifics to remain anonymous. #burnout #optimism #chuggingalong #mentalhealth