Harvard ~ Google : Your parents will brag about this to relatives at family reunions. Hardest part about it is getting in. Yale ~ Meta : Big blue. Second fiddle among the big boys and always has a chip on their shoulder about it. Full of Slytherins 🐍 Princeton ~ Jane Street : Small but exclusive. Will unironically talk about being masters of the universe around the eating clubs. Stanford ~ Stripe : Entrepreneurial and smart; claims to be disruptive but really just tinkering around the edges. Has contrarian opinions about lots of topics. Worships Peter Thiel. MIT ~ Databricks : Don't talk to them if you can't prove P != NP (elementary). Invented a new IHTFP networking protocol. Did they mention that they got a 1600 on their SAT? Columbia ~ Apple : Cool kids on the block but not the best in tech. Prominent in pop culture. Trend-setters, wear black turtlenecks everywhere. Incredibly flush with cash. Wharton (Penn) ~ Bloomberg : Big, dumb, legacy admit but kinda good with finance. Daddy is Managing Director. Wears Patagonia vest. Brown ~ Figma : Hip and full of artsy types. Seem to always fail upwards in life. Cornell ~ Amazon : "I go to an Ivy"/"I work at a FAANG" Dartmouth ~ Pinterest : Voice crying out in the wilderness. People often forget that they exist. Caltech ~ HRT : Dorkius dorkissimus. Solves LC hards just for fun. +3σ IQ Berkeley ~ Netflix : Annoyingly progressive but superb engineers UIUC ~ Microsoft: Stodgy and old-school tech. Kinda boring. Thinks enterprise software is pretty cool. UCLA ~ Snap : Chill, west coast surfers. Runs on vibes, not too good with businessy stuff. Attractive people only. Duke ~ Uber : Party animal, always has brewski in hand. Won’t let a few “rules” get in the way of a good time. (UNC ~ Lyft : The little sibling) UChicago ~ Citadel : Where wlb goes to die. Owned by Kenny G. NYU ~ Robinhood : Came here 2 drop sum money$ 😎💰Wall Street hardo wannabes. Thinks of themselves as Patrick Bateman. CMU ~ Cruise : Does really deep ML work that no one cares about Georgetown ~ Palantir : Deeply embedded within Washington DC establishment. Probably part of a shady political cabal. UWashington ~ Tableau : Not on anyone’s radar but commands a jaw-dropping price on the tech market. Tsinghua ~ TikTok : 九九六life. Top tier engineers, just don’t talk to them about Taiwan KTH ~ Spotify : That Swedish exchange student who’s really into obscure music. Thinks 35 hours a week is hard work. Suggest more in comments. inb4 "you really wrote all this?", "are you an intern?" TC: 300k
This post is the stupidest thing I've read on Blind TC: 69k
It's both stupid as hell and strangely on point at the same time. I'd give it shit for having the vibes of someone who never moved on from college prestige whoring but the characterizations of both colleges and companies is damn good
Thank you I'm honored
That was pretty good
Love this. Spot on with Berkeley, Brown and Princeton.
You were one of those “college confidential” kids weren’t you?
stats and ECs or gtfo 😤
Infosys??
Damn is uiuc actually that much better than Purdue? I always thought they were comparable.
Purdue - HP, an old tech company in a really boring place
Colleges: you need to spend 18 years to fight for it. If you miss the train, rarely you can catch it again. Ranking stays stable. Tech Companies: anybody can pick up at anytime, 3-24 months leedcoding, and you try it multiple times. Besides, a few top talents with entrepreneur spirit never think about working for others or working at stable giant companies. Companies take turns to rise and sink. Tell me, how can you put colleges and tech companies side by side. Not the same level.
Did you go to Harvard and not end up at any named company or something? Take a chill pill man holy shit
Also, the fact that people "spend 18 years" fighting to get into a college doesn't make the college where people went to a good bar for intelligence, drive, or success. Most HYPMS kids don't become entrepreneurs either so I don't know why you're harping on that. There's the trope of the kid who peaked in college and this post reads like that. If anything, where you work and certainly what you do for work is a far better indicator because it *is* what you are doing either for society or yourself.
This post was actually very interesting and creative
Bravo. Have my upvote for the genuine chuckles!
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I usually hate these kinds of posts but this is actually funny and very true Btw, u an intern? Jk 😂