Trying to come back to work after paternity leave
My wife recently had our first child back on August 27th and, after 5 weeks of FMLA leave, I went back to work on October 1st. The problem is that after 3 weeks back at work I am still struggling to want to be here at all. It doesn't help that I didn't want to be here all that much before I went on leave, but now that I was away for over I month it is nearly impossible for me to convince myself to care. I've spent the better part of the last 5 weeks actively avoiding 50% of my duties in the hope that nobody would notice while looking for and applying to other jobs. I'm afraid that eventually someone will notice, there is very very little supervision on my team, and I will be reprimanded or straight fired, which I can't afford to do since this job somehow pays $29 and hour. My issues with the position stem from the lack of any sort of formal training or onboarding, they simply hired me and handed me a computer and showed me where my desk was. It also doesn't help that my interview was very specific in pointing out how little phone work or client contact this job would have, and then walking back on that claim once I had been in the position for a few months. Now I'm stuck in a job I simply do not care for, yet can't afford to leave, all while frustratingly watching my email for word back from literally any of the jobs I applied for.
Your problem isn't paternity it's that you never liked the job but obviously need to make a living. It sounds like you're just looking for someone to tell you what you want to hear. You've already made up your mind and just need a push to take that risk. You've a family to support, suck it up for their sake. At the same time keep trying to switch but you need to up your efforts to get some results otherwise you're wasting your time. It helps to know people, build contacts.
Agree totally with Cisco. It's the job not you. I had a job I hated, I dealt with it till I was out. Figure out how much is enough to get by, do that, don't raise eyebrows, spread out your interviews (like, don't do them all in 1 week) and actas normal as possible. By all means, gtfo of that job - you clearly hate it.
I would also give it some time. I felt the same thing after our first child. For me, it was a lack of sleep as well as my new son putting my life into perspective. After a few months when things went back to semi-normal, I started to feel better about work too. Unless you're leaving for something materially better, I would give it 3-6 months to see if you're just burnt out from being a new parent or you genuinely hate your job.
“It doesn't help that I didn't want to be here all that much before I went on leave”
My husband had a hard time returning from leave as well having kids really changes your priorities and the sleep deprivation is rough too.
Very helpful. Flagged.