Had my first official manic episode about 8 years ago. I spent $400K on who knows what in about a month, going $200K in debt and eventually filing for bankruptcy. Had a few episodes since then. I earn good money ($500K TC) but my bank account is obliterated every episode. I’m getting close to an episode. Most people don’t really get what a manic episode is. Their advice is “just set limits”, “you can control it”, “catch it early”. If it were that easy I would’ve figured it out in 8 years. Before you ask - yes been seeing a psych and therapist for > 12 years. Pay through my nose for one of the top experts in my city - yes tried > 30 meds, ketamine therapy, psychedelics therapy, alternative therapy, diet, supplements - tried self helps like Landmark, Mankind, Tony Robins. And misc other workshops, courses and retreats - went to communications workshops like Circling, NVC regularly - Also tried Christianity for 6mo. Judaism, got a bris even. Buddhist and Hindu workshops. - Saw a few advisors. Best they can do is manage my money. They have no legal right to deny access it if I request it. - Tried putting it in a 401(k), still cashed it out. Same for CDs, and other instruments. - addressed sleep issues: Olamzapine is the only thing that knocks me out during a manic episode. But then I’m a zombie for a week. It’s tricky. - hospitalizations: I get hospitalized almost every manic episode. But they only keep me for 2w. After than insurance won’t pay. After that the real damage starts - not working/traveling: during COVID took 2 years off. Traveled with my ex. Very quickly got depressed for 8 months. Ex broke up. When I recovered I moved to Hawaii, had a manic episode, wiped my savings in a month. Any suggestions on what to do? For now I transferred a bunch of my money to a family friend and gave a loan for a car to another family friend. I’ve got about $45K coming in post tax from stock and bonus in the next 2’months. Should I continue with this strategy or better ideas? TC $500K.
Maybe you could get rental property? Or something that requires you paying over time?
Yes. That is a long term plan. Problem is: 1. My savings get wiped every 1-2y 2. I am often unemployed for 2-6 months due to crippling depression 3. This is the worst economic climate I’ve experienced Once I have the money to buy a properly in cash, this will be a good strategy.
The only way my ex managed manic episodes was meds. And sometimes he was committed (for our/his safety.)
Yup. Tried > 30 meds. On 5 at the moment with one of the top BP docs in the city. And have been hospitalized 5 times. Problem is they only keep you for 2 weeks. After I’m out is when the real damage happens
But then…how do I get my money out? Also I can easily call the banking institution and reset my password. I’ve done this with my 401K
Do you trust the people you are parking your money with? Also, why are manic episodes just about spending money? Did you figure that out?
Let’s say I have a 30% chance of having a manic episode in the next few months There’s a 50% chance I will wipe my bank account My family friend has known my family for 30y. They run in the same circles as my family. If they were to fuck me over they’re be losing their social network. Also they’re like 70. So let’s say there is a conservative 5% chance they fuck me over. I like those odds. Ultimately I trust them over myself. Also, I’m distributing my money amongst a few family friends. Why do I spend money: I feel no control over my life. In a manic episode I attempt to assert control. I freak the fuck out and become adversarial and sometimes litigious. I want to prove that I can take control of my life and live how I want and start my own company that does things my way rather than being an overpaid pixel pusher. I have no business plan whatsoever. I just want to prove “them” wrong. And then I crash. 6 months of catatonic depression and feeling absolutely powerless and useless and hopeless.
It looks like you have a lot of self awareness and are a logical person too. IMO, I suggest alternatives to storing money with people. People can forget, die, make mistakes, get greedy, change over time. This is not sustainable long term, especially as you age. You may also lose legal claim to that money the moment you transferred (“gifted”) the money to someone else. Can you perhaps move all your money into a trust managed by a financial institution (Fidelity, Chase etc) for a fixed fee? Set it up such that you can’t withdraw more than X amount per month unless another person signs off on it?
Have you looked into seeing a therapist? A good therapist can really help you change your behaviors, and it sounds like you can easily afford one too. Best of luck to you and hope ypu are able to work through what you are experiencing.
Yes. Added above
I'm sorry to hear about your struggles with manic episodes. It's commendable that you're seeking solutions. Entrusting your finances to a trusted family friend for now seems like a responsible step to prevent impulsive spending. Consulting with a mental health professional experienced in managing bipolar disorder could provide personalized strategies to help mitigate the financial impact of future episodes. Additionally, consider exploring long-term financial planning options with the assistance of a financial advisor who understands your situation and can help safeguard your assets during episodes.
Saw a few advisors. Best they can do is manage my money. They have no legal right to deny access it if I request it.
I said this in another comment, but if you get a trust, or have someone set up a trust for you, you can make it so you can't cancel it or pull money out impulsively. But you can put money in. It's good to be thinking about this now. The worst thing with BP is that mania damages the brain and destroys your ability to know anything is wrong. That's what went wrong with my sister. She was great at managing her condition as long as she was aware of it. Now she adame tly denies anything is wrong and attributes all the fuckery in her life to people secretly poisoning her or whatever.
I am sorry you are going through this. My ex went though many meds until he finally figured out what works for him, keep trying. And if you can’t control the spending spree at all, have you considered hiring a financial manager to take it over from you?
Yes details above
Sorry, saw it later. I was thinking more of fund arrangement where fund manager puts draconian rules in place making it very very difficult to withdraw
Someone i know invests most of his paycheck in fixed investments to avoid spending it. Cancellation penalty and hassle is a deterrent.
Added details above, tried this with a 401(k)
Won't for here unfortunately. When manic these things don't register. OP, you'll need to create a trust that only disburses a fixed percentage of your assets to you and is completely out of your control for 99 years. This is the kind of arrangements that rich people make for their kids where they get an allowance but the principal remains untouched. If you give someone the money to keep, they'll simply say you threatened to kill yourself if they didn't give it back and they'll blow your money. You'll be none the wiser. Think bro
lol
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