I play an act mostly because I think it's required. Is anyone able to be themselves in front of their bosses?
I was real with my managers. Depends on your comfort level, which is probably based on your perceived value add to the team. If you're doing well, you probably will be more likely to be you. I used to go on drives and play video games with my manager (20 year age gap too)
Your manager would appreciate it if you would be real with them too. But, without trust (both ways), it doesn't happen. And it takes shared experiences and time to build that trust first. That's why it's usually a lot easier to be real with coworkers.
I treat everyone the same from student to director. I'm not fake to anyone. I don't get promoted very often. 🤣
It’s a working relationship. Being real is a reciprocal matter and in asymmetric power dynamics should always come from the more strongly positioned person first. If you feel treated as a serf nothing good comes from being a courtesan to the leadership.
You should never be real with your colleagues either. If you stay past a few years, it is inevitable that you/your colleagues become each other’s manager, or you compete for the same position, or you are simply given a promotion/raise ahead of them. It is saddening to see all that “realness” you spewed out in the past turned against you then. Just keep it simple and put your work personality on. Also to clarify. I’m not saying you should be lying and saying shit you don’t mean or bottling up how you feel. I mean that you should not share your personal views just to vent, and you should never reveal your emotions in an uncontrolled setting. If you have a conversation about how you feel about something, make sure you have a goal you want to achieve that the other person can help with. This goes for boss or colleague or direct report
This needs around INF more votes. It's not about lying, but setting boundaries. For example, I never talk politics at work, learned my lesson long ago.
Before you can be yourself, you'll have to figure out who you are first...
Lol this is 200% true for me...and thats why most of the times i sound dumb
I was real with my manager and I was put on pip for insubordinate behavior.
Before the mind virus, one could be real w/coworkers. Depending on the company and how much actual power your manager had wrt career/employment status, you could be some degree of "professionally" real. In today's mind virus minefield, one must be middle neutral/handwavy vague or if RNGesus has smiled upon you by placing you on a team of rainbow hair/face piercing alphabet mafia types, you can easily game that situation by joining the LARPing session. The downside is that you have to join the LARPing session. It's much like the TOS mirror universe episode. The good types can easily play bad types, but the inability for the converse to hold was their undoing. If not so fortunate as to be on a team of those advertising their bent, it's self-preserving neutral-caution all day/every day. Why do you think blind, and its ilk, ever became a thing? It certainly wasn't for TC sharing. I assert it was to be able to state things that would otherwise end your career/job given today's political climate. To express discontent w/out having to be burnt at the stake because of someone's feelz. At least career-wise. The especially sensitive types can still send you to 'blind jail' though.
Idk but would love to know also