Dating

Cisco primeNmbr
Nov 10, 2017 58 Comments

Recently came to know that my daughter may be seeing/attracted to someone(a guy :)) who is 4-5 years elder to her. She is 14-15. What should I do as a parent. Should I even do something? Serious opinion only fellas-

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TOP 58 Comments
  • Yahoo anonhoo
    It’s illegal threaten police immediately!
    Nov 10, 2017 5
    • Microsoft
      yMcg47

      Microsoft

      BIO
      Amicitiae nostrae memoriam spero sempiternam fore
      yMcg47more
      How would threatening the police help
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Yahoo anonhoo
      Get the creep away
      Nov 11, 2017
    • BAE Systems dKSR27
      It depends what country you are in. Some countries it is legal. Other countries it is not. For example in the UK, any sex under the age of 16 is considered Rape.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Verathon / Eng
      naw

      Verathon Eng

      BIO
      💅 Seattle
      nawmore
      Microsoft dude LOL
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Google jghyrh
      Do the needful and threaten police
      Nov 11, 2017
  • 13 year old girls get fucked all the time in US. Even I had sex at that she. You can’t stop it. Just tell your daughter to always do with a condom and not be a teen mom.
    Nov 11, 2017 12
    • Cisco / Design amigo1
      @yahoo. Blondgold ‘s point is about sex-ed and parent daughter communication, in general. Not particularly about this situation!

      None else talked about this in this thread.. perhaps blondgold’s choice of words were too direct.. but I think it’s just fine. That’s just the reality.

      On top of that OP must assure unconditional support and strength to the girl. Don’t use fear, guilt or judge.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Airbnb hunter3
      13 year old girls don’t get fucked by men 18+.

      If you are ever even considering this, go visit a prison and look at the living hell sex offenders go through. Lots of people wrongfully imprisoned on stupid drug charges, with families and daughters they can’t be with and watch grow up. When they find out a guy took advantage of their girl, that guy finds semen in his food and shit in his bed and vice versa.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Fitbit nak6lp
      Meh, we've all done that
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Yahoo jzcy26
      a. i'm American as apple pie. b. your language is crude particularly as you are talking about GIRLS. c. girls have no life experience and don't need to develop it with loser child molester rapists. d. this is the same argument as Mary in the Bible was a teenager. e. ayfkm?

      cisco I'm well aware of what he said. it's disgusting, particularly in the context of statutory rape.

      airbnb thank you.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Cisco primeNmbr
      OP
      No, we have not all done it!
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Microsoft / Eng
      Alotcould

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Hate coding quizzes but studying hard for better future!
      Alotcouldmore
      @BlindGold, do you understand we are talking about 20 years old possibly molesting 14-15 years old? It is not about 15 years old dating a guy in her age. If an adult had physical relationship with a minor, we should report to police and he will serve years in prison. You don't sound like you know the law in US and are probably an immigrant yourself.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • I know as per law you are not allowed to have sex or have alcohol before you turn 18. But lot of people do that. I think it’s fine if it’s consensual. Molesting is not consensual.

      If you don’t believe that, just ask someone in high school who is open to tell you the truth.
      Nov 12, 2017
    • Yahoo jzcy26
      it is rape when a person in the relationship is under age : that person can not legally consent. that is because they are not old enough to understand what they are doing and what the consequences are due to underdeveloped pre frontal cortex ie they lack insight to prevent impulsivity. it's beyond gross that you are arguing what you are in this context.
      Nov 12, 2017
    • Yahoo jzcy26
      they are not yet OF AGE TO CONSENT
      Nov 12, 2017
    • Microsoft / Eng
      Alotcould

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Hate coding quizzes but studying hard for better future!
      Alotcouldmore
      @BlondeGold Again we are NOT talking about sex with similar age. We are talking about 20 years old with 15 years old! I am not sure what is going on in your home country but it is illegal here and you serve the prison time if you do. Ask high school students? Are you kidding me? You try that first. First thing they will do is calling for police as you immediately become a child predator suspect. If you don't know how serious of a crime that is, just search for the news article.

      I don't know how you learnt about US culture but you have complete misunderstanding. It might not be illegal in rural areas of some developing countries but it is here in US. Just have conversation with your American colleagues. They may start looking at you as a pervert and distant themselves from you but ask them if 15 year olds having sex with adults were common in their high school years if you strongly believe this is really common in this country. You are falsely misleading people here for serious crime. This is not one or two years term type of crime. We are talking about at least 7 years term with a registered sex offender name tag for life. Basically, your life is done even after serving in prison.

      To help your understanding, see the following recent article: Teacher, 29, arrested for having unprotected sex with 17-year-old student, police say - Fox News
      https://apple.news/Awo1_OV-FTN2z2EdtVUvr8A
      Nov 19, 2017
  • Yahoo anonhoo
    Should you do anything? Some 20 year old is trying to bang your 15 year old daughter, what if he got her pregnant, dudes gotta be a loser.
    Nov 10, 2017 3
    • Cisco primeNmbr
      OP
      Well I think I should've been specific. I've already told what I should tell my daughter. My question was if I should specifically take legal action immediately or dealing at the parents' level is OK.
      Nov 10, 2017
    • Yahoo anonhoo
      Hmm this dude is a freak, I mean if he had sexual contact with her I would do something. Maybe get the police involved regardless and put a scare in him/ start a paper trail for when he does this again.
      Nov 10, 2017
    • Microsoft / Eng
      Alotcould

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Hate coding quizzes but studying hard for better future!
      Alotcouldmore
      You don't need civil legal action. Any physical relationship with minor is considered as a serious crime and he will be in jail for years. Search some news and you will see how serious it is.
      Nov 10, 2017
  • Yes, you should definitely intervene. He is definitely a loser if he's an adult hanging out with/dating your 14-15 year old. I'd have a talk with her to understand/get more information without judging... and then try to talk some sense into her after.

    Also remind him that she is too young, you don't approve, and the law will be the least of his worries if you catch him around her again. Problem solved.
    Nov 10, 2017 1
    • Cisco primeNmbr
      OP
      "law would be least of his worries" that's some badass parent statement..I'll use it if need be
      Nov 10, 2017
  • Lyft Euxsjwj
    Woah crazy stuff here. I'm with Fitbit
    I'd just ask her to be careful and trust she knows sup ?
    Nov 11, 2017 1
    • Google / Eng ungoogley
      Trust a 15 year old girl to not get wrapped up in her feelings and look at this analytically... Please never procreate
      Nov 11, 2017
  • Fitbit nak6lp
    Dunno man, back in Europe this would be totally OK. I mean, it's just a few years difference. Might even be legal over there. How does it work in the US? If I'm 18, can I bang a 17 year-old?
    Nov 10, 2017 7
    • Cisco primeNmbr
      OP
      Well in the US, underage is underage, you can be prosecuted. Underage definition varies by state but it's usually 16-18.
      Nov 10, 2017
    • Cisco primeNmbr
      OP
      Europe may be liberal. But don't you think 17 is still a young age to be in a relationship? Post high school is ok.
      Nov 10, 2017
    • 18 and 17 is WAY different (not legally, but in terms of fatherly and ethical considerations). We are talking 18-14.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Cisco primeNmbr
      OP
      Yup.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Microsoft Cdgthnjn
      Normally they would look at the age difference. If she was 13 and he was 17, no crime. 14-18 there is. If one was 17 and the other 18, normally it would be pursued, even though the 18 is an adult
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Fitbit nak6lp
      Very interesting, I really don't see the difference
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Microsoft / Eng
      Alotcould

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Hate coding quizzes but studying hard for better future!
      Alotcouldmore
      So many creeps. No wonder tech people are looked that way. @nak6lp where in Europe are you from? I actually doubt you are from Europe. Are you from a country where marrying a minor is not a big deal? Here, you will serve minimum seven years in jail for raping a minor in the name of dating. Yes you may want to call it love or date whatever but from legal standpoint, it is not that different from rape and child molester. Adults dating a 15 years old is not only creepy, it is a serious crime. Once you are prosecuted, your picture and name can be found from web as a registered sex offender.
      Nov 11, 2017
  • Illumina / Other
    💯Lumens

    Illumina Other

    PRE
    Illumina
    💯Lumensmore
    This isn't a "dating" question. A 20 year old is making emotional and/or physical overtures to your 15 year old daughter. That is entirely inappropriate and you should absolutely make it stop.
    Nov 11, 2017 0
  • Microsoft / Eng
    Principal

    Microsoft Eng

    BIO
    ;
    Principalmore
    My personal advice is to first convince your daughter. If you succeed in this then the rest is easy.
    Nov 11, 2017 0
  • Expedia Salmonella
    Wait a second. Is she seeing him or is she attracted to him? Big fucking difference. Statutory rape size difference
    Nov 11, 2017 6
    • Cisco primeNmbr
      OP
      Seeing.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Expedia Salmonella
      Cal the cops
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Microsoft / Eng
      Alotcould

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Hate coding quizzes but studying hard for better future!
      Alotcouldmore
      Oh shit. Haven't you called the cops or talked to he lawyer yet? Warn her boy friend that this is a serious crime and you would not allow him dating her. Also warn your daughter that by dating him, she is leading him to jail. This is definitely a crime and you could get in trouble for not calling the police because you are basically ignoring the crime scene. Dating a minor is a serious crime as I said above. Just find a single news paper article and show that to them. That should scare the hell out of them. It is not just serving a community service type, he will literally spend years in jail. Act immediately for everyone's sake.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Cisco primeNmbr
      OP
      We're dealing with it as best as possible, no cops just yet.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Yahoo jzcy26
      alotcould "ignoring the crime scene" or accessory to the crime works a bit differently because with parental consent, they can marry.
      Nov 12, 2017
    • Yahoo jzcy26
      cisco call the cops and file a report. it creates a record of where you stand on the matter, it places the matter in the hands of justice instead of your own limited scope and it shows your daughter and her rapist that you are serious. neither is going to stop or take you seriously until then anyway. because "we're soulmates" I'm sure.
      Nov 12, 2017
  • BlackBerry Android🤖
    Talk to the guy and ask him without getting angry what his intentions are. Talk to your daughter separately
    Nov 11, 2017 0
  • Salesforce HollaDolla
    Oh hell no. Do you listen to the news at all??
    Nov 11, 2017 0
  • Yahoo jzcy26
    this is not ok. you need to report and seek legal action. 14 and 20 are worlds apart and legally this is prohibited due to that.
    Nov 11, 2017 0
  • Apple Yghgddfghh
    If he is over 18 then the law forbids it. If he's under 18, then you should talk to your daughter about safe sex. Be more of a friend to her so she feels comfortable opening up to you.
    Nov 11, 2017 0
  • Microsoft / Eng
    Alotcould

    Microsoft Eng

    BIO
    Hate coding quizzes but studying hard for better future!
    Alotcouldmore
    Any physical contact with minor is a serious crime. You don't need to make any personal threat. Just inform the police. If you search some news about relationship with minor, you will find they are in jail for years.
    Nov 10, 2017 0
  • Databricks / Eng
    datadicks

    Databricks Eng

    BIO
    I suck
    datadicksmore
    Its weird that 4 to 5 years is a huge deal at that age but then if its 20 and 24 its really no biggy
    Nov 11, 2017 2
    • Illumina / Other
      💯Lumens

      Illumina Other

      PRE
      Illumina
      💯Lumensmore
      1/2 plus seven of 24 is 19, so yep, checks out.
      Nov 11, 2017
    • Microsoft / Eng
      Alotcould

      Microsoft Eng

      BIO
      Hate coding quizzes but studying hard for better future!
      Alotcouldmore
      It is NOT weird. Take for an example - can you imagine 10 years old dating 15 years old? How about this - 1 year old dating 6 years old. If that sounds alright to you, I am afraid you are FBI's no. 1 list and are in danger of being caught as a pedophila. It is a serious crime in US and people who assaults (yeah you cannot call it a date) minor spends over 10+ years in jail at least. Just read the newspapers. Adults dating 15 years?? Come on! That is seriously disgusting.
      Nov 11, 2017
  • This comment was deleted by original commenter.

    • Cisco primeNmbr
      OP
      Yup. Am totally on it if it gets real!
      Nov 10, 2017
  • Microsoft / Eng
    Alotcould

    Microsoft Eng

    BIO
    Hate coding quizzes but studying hard for better future!
    Alotcouldmore
    Adult having unprotected sex is illegal even with 17 years old: Teacher, 29, arrested for having unprotected sex with 17-year-old student, police say - Fox News
    https://apple.news/Awo1_OV-FTN2z2EdtVUvr8A
    Nov 19, 2017 0
  • Ten-X aibN45
    Break legs, serious
    Nov 12, 2017 0
  • Cisco Peasant
    How did you come to know this? You sound like you aren't sure if she's attracted only or actually involved. There is a big difference between the two.
    Nov 11, 2017 0
  • Uber / Eng
    Rqwx5o

    Uber Eng

    PRE
    Google
    Rqwx5omore
    Does it matter to you if she has sex with him or a guy her age?
    Nov 11, 2017 0
  • WRKSHP / Eng
    Make her understand that it's not legal and give her every resource to be safe.
    +1 to @Principal in that if she's convinced (and thus spends less time with him, and stay in public), you should be OK.
    Nov 11, 2017 0

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