First date, didn’t feel the spark. What do you do?

Salesforce B0h3m1an
Jul 9 23 Comments

Don’t lie.

254 VOTES SELECT ONLY ONE ANSWER
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TOP 23 Comments
  • Indeed Ioser
    jesus what kind of loser makes a full blown post about one date that didnt go perfect. no wonder there was no spark.
    Jul 9 6
    • Susquehanna International / Eng Kristaps11
      You must be new to Blind.
      Jul 9
    • Salesforce B0h3m1an
      OP
      Wish it was just one date didn’t go perfect. These are actual responses I got from the guys I went on dates with. All different individuals for the last half a year or so. Funny thing is that among those men, ghosting was their go-to. People in Blind must be generally honest and up-front and are off the dating apps. But there always have to be a bully or a villain, right?
      Jul 9
    • Indeed Ioser
      what.

      what were their responses? and also you have several misconceptions which I’ll outline for your to consider.

      1. blind audience is not the best representation for, nor a good source of advice for, sexual/dating advice. its literally the Blind leading the blind.

      2. if a dude ghosts its probably due to lack of desired level of attractiveness on the part of the female.

      3. no, people on blind are probably liars as well. theyre old people that have antiquated conceptions of dating so there are age group gaps. you don’t date a 30yo the same you do a 20.

      4. that kind of thinking is not constructive and a symptom of a larger underlying toxic mentality. granted sex and dating is all about the power dynamic but there doesn’t have to be a bully or a villain.
      Jul 9
    • Salesforce B0h3m1an
      OP
      1. Did you even read what I wrote? Those options in the vote are actual responses from men. 2. Obviously this was intended for fun and curiosity. But this is a community that I have a lot of common with. There have been more than enough genuine and mature people I’ve seen so far. 3. Again, you are repeating a known factor. I know why they ghost and that’s why it’s so interesting to see Blind users respect honesty more. 4. The bully I’m referring to here is you. Read your first comment again and change my mind.
      Jul 9
    • Indeed Ioser
      not into changing your mind or this argument. good luck though :)
      Jul 9
  • Amazon TiCi
    Hey ___, this is B0h3m1an from Salesforce, is this a good time to reconnect? Great, so I have just received the results from the emotional committee and they have decided to not move forward with another date at this time.

    Some of the feedback included a lack of ability to trigger a spark and despite the politeness during the date, the emotional evaluation yielded a result of boredom. I know this is not the result we were hoping for but it is the final result and there’s nothing we can do at this point. Best of luck on your future dates.
    Jul 9 1
    • Microsoft stink
      And “you may not apply again ever”
      Jul 9
  • Facebook Sffffft
    All these options are dumb AF. You can be honest without being rude. Just say it was nice to meet you but I’m not really feeling like there’s chemistry between us. Good luck with your Tinder (or whatever app cause you’re clearly an app dater) search. Done. No need to say you’re not attracted, that’s just unnecessary.
    Jul 9 0
  • Amazon echo $?
    My love story with my wife of 16 years turned out a lot like the book Pride & Prejudice: the spark of love snuck up on us slowly over the course of a year until we just burst. An instant connection is possible (I’ve had that with friends and past girlfriends) but they tend to burn out as quickly as they started.

    The advantage of this approach is that it builds until finally you get together in the end. It cements you closer and you’re less likely to leave. But it requires patience and may never materialize.
    Jul 9 2
    • Salesforce B0h3m1an
      OP
      But it’s a different world now. One date of two hours of chatting determines the next move and what’s frustrating me is that most guys don’t even make the next move. They just ghost.
      Jul 9
    • Amazon echo $?
      Maybe with a guy you don’t have any past history with, sure, but if you ask out a friend with whom you have a little chemistry, you might do better.
      Jul 9
  • Why do we need a poll where an option is “be honest”. That’s the answer. That’s always the answer in relationships.
    Jul 9 0
  • Toyota NullGfExep
    Girl spotted
    Jul 9 0
  • Microsoft yesterda
    Did you take the lighter for spark ?
    Jul 9 0
  • Google Rockfish
    Fart and if he or she laughs, then it's meant to be
    Jul 9 0
  • Google jfdcjjuyf
    I'd do a 2nd date, unless I still have many candidates in the pool that I have to go through.
    Op, best not to take rejection personally. Ghosting or silly excuses are not too different, if you are experienced enough to recodnize them as another way more implicit to convey rejection.
    Jul 9 0
  • Bank of America REax37
    If the person is reasonable and there are no red flags, go on a 2nd date to be sure. There’s more to life than initial chemistry.
    Jul 9 0
  • Capital One
    bigTCpimp

    Capital One

    PRE
    OSIsoft
    bigTCpimpmore
    Bone anyway?
    Jul 9 0
  • Del
    Jul 9 0
  • Best Buy / Eng
    VU5FUkQ=

    Best Buy Eng

    PRE
    Microsoft
    VU5FUkQ=more
    It seems like your instincts are telling you no. Trust your instincts and move on.
    Jul 9 0
  • Google helllooooo
    *some* guys take a really long time to act like themselves and not be so nervous. So Id go for a second date, ice is broken and maybe I can actually get to know him now.
    Jul 9 0