Wish it was just one date didn’t go perfect. These are actual responses I got from the guys I went on dates with. All different individuals for the last half a year or so. Funny thing is that among those men, ghosting was their go-to. People in Blind must be generally honest and up-front and are off the dating apps. But there always have to be a bully or a villain, right?
what were their responses? and also you have several misconceptions which I’ll outline for your to consider.
1. blind audience is not the best representation for, nor a good source of advice for, sexual/dating advice. its literally the Blind leading the blind.
2. if a dude ghosts its probably due to lack of desired level of attractiveness on the part of the female.
3. no, people on blind are probably liars as well. theyre old people that have antiquated conceptions of dating so there are age group gaps. you don’t date a 30yo the same you do a 20.
4. that kind of thinking is not constructive and a symptom of a larger underlying toxic mentality. granted sex and dating is all about the power dynamic but there doesn’t have to be a bully or a villain.
1. Did you even read what I wrote? Those options in the vote are actual responses from men. 2. Obviously this was intended for fun and curiosity. But this is a community that I have a lot of common with. There have been more than enough genuine and mature people I’ve seen so far. 3. Again, you are repeating a known factor. I know why they ghost and that’s why it’s so interesting to see Blind users respect honesty more. 4. The bully I’m referring to here is you. Read your first comment again and change my mind.
Hey ___, this is B0h3m1an from Salesforce, is this a good time to reconnect? Great, so I have just received the results from the emotional committee and they have decided to not move forward with another date at this time.
Some of the feedback included a lack of ability to trigger a spark and despite the politeness during the date, the emotional evaluation yielded a result of boredom. I know this is not the result we were hoping for but it is the final result and there’s nothing we can do at this point. Best of luck on your future dates.
All these options are dumb AF. You can be honest without being rude. Just say it was nice to meet you but I’m not really feeling like there’s chemistry between us. Good luck with your Tinder (or whatever app cause you’re clearly an app dater) search. Done. No need to say you’re not attracted, that’s just unnecessary.
My love story with my wife of 16 years turned out a lot like the book Pride & Prejudice: the spark of love snuck up on us slowly over the course of a year until we just burst. An instant connection is possible (I’ve had that with friends and past girlfriends) but they tend to burn out as quickly as they started.
The advantage of this approach is that it builds until finally you get together in the end. It cements you closer and you’re less likely to leave. But it requires patience and may never materialize.
I'd do a 2nd date, unless I still have many candidates in the pool that I have to go through. Op, best not to take rejection personally. Ghosting or silly excuses are not too different, if you are experienced enough to recodnize them as another way more implicit to convey rejection.