Indian MBA women so arrogant

Google / Eng
‘Nutella’

Google Eng

PRE
Google
‘Nutella’more
Jul 6, 2018 138 Comments

I am a indian dude. I am talking to a few Indian women in the context of potentially getting married. Many of these women work in tech companies in the Bay Area.
If someone is somewhat attractive, they are extremely arrogant. They seem dominating in nature, especially the MBA types. The engineering ones seem better except the ones from amazon seem really arrogant.

These women expect the guy to throw their career and follow the future wife.

I am inclined to throw in the towel and marry a non-indian who I seem to get along with and have better chemistry. Many of them don’t seem to be arrogant to that degree (I dated a non-Indian girl who is a asst professor in economics/gsb at stanford, and she was good). The tech Indian women say things like - do you know i work at amazon. I am senior management, etc. note that they are often 1-2 years out of grad schools or mbas. Blinders had suggested marrying Indian for less stress but it seems it is worse.

Lots of stereotypes and PC incorrect statements here, but would love to get the community thoughts.

Note - I am talking to these women on Shaadi.com where folks have short relationships with the goal of getting married in 3-6 months.

Edit: TC: 650K, YOE: 5 assuming not counting grad school. Age:32 (I got asked these in private messages)

comments

Want to comment? LOG IN or SIGN UP
TOP 138 Comments
  • Google Mickey
    ....I don’t think the women are the problem.
    Jul 6, 2018 24
    • Google ninjagal
      Maybe you are talking to the girl's parents on shaadi.com
      Jul 6, 2018
    • New / Product HHcN03
      Put me in touch with that crypto chick, OP. I want somebody to vitalik my buterin.
      Jul 6, 2018
    • New / Product HHcN03
      I am going to take the moment to also shill my $ZIL bags. Check out testnet results. We're getting close to epic tx speeds. Also check out Harmony. Just a whitepaper atm but has promise.
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Yahoo / Eng Chumlee
      I want someone to satoshi my nakamoto as well
      Jul 12, 2018
    • Google girlcoder
      I was looking into blockchain a bit. Had a couple of ideas but didn't pursue it.
      Jul 13, 2018
  • This comment was deleted by original commenter.

    • Aon Hewitt Skjgvg
      Staples 👍🏽
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Aon Hewitt Skjgvg
      Btw where did you find your guy? I'm looking for one with those qualities
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Google / Eng phallacy
      Thriving career at Staples after business school? What kind of men did you intimidate lol.
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Aon Hewitt Skjgvg
      Seriously phallacy? What are you trying to say?
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      Phallacy exactly agree
      Jul 6, 2018
  • Microsoft L62SDE
    Why shouldn’t they be ? Given they had to fight innumerable stereotypes to reach where they are as compared to Indian men who are still spoon fed each day ( don’t take it personally but our female caretakers have royally spoiled us with all the attention that it makes us think we are the center of the universe ).

    Indian women are awesome. Just learn to give immense respect and absorb more from them then what you have to offer. And you will just do fine.
    Jul 6, 2018 0
  • Google / Eng
    ‘Nutella’

    Google Eng

    PRE
    Google
    ‘Nutella’more
    OP
    Can’t send you private message.
    Sexist pig - my family has many women including my mom (she is a vice chancellor of a university in India) who are very successful.

    What I saw in many MBA women was -
    1. I am the boss attitude - I will dominate you.
    2. Lack of feminity / mellowness / calmness. Lot of - what’s in it for me.
    3. Engineer = worker bee. I am queen. I am MBA.
    I am boss. You are worker
    4. Many amazon women were proud of Amazon stock price and have become rich. This makes them feel that they want a servant and not a husband.
    Many are rabidly feminist, and surprisingly many quote Ayn Rand as their favorite writer.

    I can’t dm you (blind says I can’t) but where did you move. I might have to look at non Indian women again - larger pool means atleast someone might be good for me
    Jul 6, 2018 10
    • Comcast HraNPs5647
      Oh nvm my email isn’t verified (and not gonna. I’m suspicious of Blind’s business model)

      OP do you have a good “game”? Can you approach women and start a good conversation? Do you have interesting hobbies? Did you have girlfriends before moving to SV, or were you always Raj from Big Bang Theory? Can you charm a lady, make her feel like that you’re the best shit ever?

      In my case I knew I’d do better elsewhere. NYC is a bachelor guy’s paradise. But if you don’t have a good game, moving elsewhere won’t help. Your lady problems will follow you. Specially with American women, because “silent and strong type” is not a thing here. They expect men to be outgoing and confidant. Idk how much your game needs to improve, but since you’re a Google Eng I’d assume that you spent more time studying than talking to girls in school (if there were any)
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      I have decent game. I am good at approaching and met my last 2 girlfriends at 1. A coffee shop and 2. At a running class at the gym. Trouble is that it’s hard to find indian girls this way. One girl was asian (Chinese ethnicity but from SoCal) and the other was white.
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      Maybe I will go to NYC after all
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Microsoft JsonBlob
      Dude, why do you want an Indian woman? You have dated other ethnicities before and seems like you have enjoyed that. Why the insistence on someone indian?
      Jul 7, 2018
    • Wells Fargo tweedler
      Maybe for family reasons, I don't blame the OP
      Jul 15, 2018
  • Microsoft / Product @zzz
    You are reinforcing the Indian male stereotypes, not the women.
    Jul 6, 2018 1
    • Facebook / Other
      XKLa50

      Facebook Other

      BIO
      Data scientist
      XKLa50more
      It's the wrong stereotype. It's that many Indians (of both genders) are generally full of bloviating garbage and devoid of humility and self-awareness; the signaling to signal ratio is off the charts. Say this as an Indian male. I'd totally date a random, smart American in lieu of a random, thinks-she-is-smart Indian (the same is true of many Indian men). To the OP: Keep away from MBA types (what I call high V, low M). They are the most confused people you can find, but utterly unaware of the limitations of their "profundity".
      Jul 7, 2018
  • This comment was deleted by original commenter.

    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      I want someone who is nurturing and supportive. These are important qualities. I want someone who will prioritize kids.
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      Obviously I am generalizing and am aware of that.
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      Wowlak, Why are you so angry?
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Amazon / Product Ulub72
      Will you prioritize kids and what does it mean? Be stay at home mom? Will you be a stay at home dad if she earns more ?
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Aon Hewitt Skjgvg
      I think at this point based on her level and career growth, you should be the one prioritizing kids and staying home with them. Nothing wrong with being a stay at home dad.
      Jul 6, 2018
  • Cadence aPGL81
    I am an Indian women who married and Indian male after years of searching on Shaadi.com. I am an engineer who studied here. Career was important for me. Questions such as "do u go to the temple" , "do u cook" , " women should quit when they have kids" was a big turn off for me. Prepare your questions before you talk to someone. It might help. I have been married for 5 years and have a kid. We both share the load and have fun.
    Jul 7, 2018 9
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      Mostly Shaddi.com and similar sites
      Jul 7, 2018
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      Oh yeah the MIT girl (she was the Bitcoin girl).

      Her: yeah I am going to MIT next year to study bitcoin in the context of philosophy.
      Me: oh nice. Does MIT have a good philosophy program? How is bitcoin philosophy.
      Her: yeah it does. Apparently you went to MIT and don’t even know they do philosophy of bitcoin there.
      Me: I went there many years ago. So are you starting in fall or next year.
      Her: I actually haven’t applied yet.

      Me: I like your confidence, I was never sure I would get in, but you are confident.
      Me: I think this crypto currency stuff is fraud.
      Her: you don’t have the vision. Engineers are not visionary. Good luck with your search.
      Me: thanks

      This happened yesterday. She rejected me without talking to me based on my WhatsApp messages.

      This is 100% real. I deleted my WhatsApp but shouldn’t have
      Jul 7, 2018
    • New twope
      So it's good, OP, that she weeded herself out (in a way). I would also suggest that you to pay heed to what aPGL81 said. Basically, if you are OK with & believe in marriage equality, you've gotta be OK with (based on your example) the girl's parents visiting for extended periods of time as well. If you are, hope you are communicating that clearly. Finally, it can be quite discouraging, but remember that it's the exceptional ones that find it much harder than the rest, to find a worthy partner. Goes for both genders. So don't lose hope yet & keep looking. GL.
      Jul 7, 2018
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      Or course - I welcome the girls parents too.
      Jul 7, 2018
    • Google / Eng protohoe
      Lmfao
      Jul 11, 2018
  • Uber vHvb35
    Wow don't you sound like a catch.

    News flash: Your loss likely won't even bother Indian women, and you "throwing the towel" means in no way you will find anyone else willing to bend to your will... only because she has a vagina.

    Like - how awesome do you think you are or how badly do you think women need marriage, that they would immediately throw away their careers to follow you? Even if they worked hard to get there?

    Get a clue.
    Jul 6, 2018 0
  • F5 Networks / Sales
    FauxMe

    F5 Networks Sales

    PRE
    500 Startups
    BIO
    ...
    FauxMemore
    Jul 6, 2018 4
    • Google Mickey
      That character and actor would both be ashamed to be associated wit that meme.
      Jul 6, 2018
    • New / Product HHcN03
      Sad shit
      Jul 6, 2018
    • F5 Networks / Sales
      FauxMe

      F5 Networks Sales

      PRE
      500 Startups
      BIO
      ...
      FauxMemore
      Jul 7, 2018
    • New / Product HHcN03
      Jul 7, 2018
  • Microsoft msboy
    MBA types are generally lacking intelligence. It's not specific to Indian women
    Jul 6, 2018 2
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      I can’t tell about intelligence, but the have loads of arrogance, combined with ignorance. I am probably not stupid either but I don’t think arrogance is a attractive quality.
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Wells Fargo tweedler
      I think this is very common among Indian women
      Jul 15, 2018
  • This comment was deleted by original commenter.

    • Facebook supichai
      If natural it will not seem so, if put on or fake because that's society thinks is powerful it will stand out like a sore thumb
      Jul 6, 2018
  • Capital One / Eng KNABRIAF
    You act like you have so many prospects to choose from and marry. What makes you think all of these women even want to marry you?
    Jul 6, 2018 1
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      Good question. I don’t know. However they are talking to me so I am assuming there is non zero interest.
      Jul 6, 2018
  • Google / Eng
    ‘Nutella’

    Google Eng

    PRE
    Google
    ‘Nutella’more
    OP
    One girl - ‘I work in the USA, the worlds most competitive economy. I studied Management and Information science at school X. I talk to CEOs, not people like you’

    Another girl - ‘yeah I don’t think you will be able to understand what I do. It strategic stuff. I can try explaining but you probably need a MBA to get it’.
    Me: perhaps you can try.
    Her: umm, it will be hard for eng people to understand but I do advanced analytics and leverage forecasting tools to deliver strategic business value by managing change across the organization’ (I copy pasted from WhatsApp)

    As background, I (op) have a engineering graduate degree, so I can probably understand some stuff but yeah I didn’t understand this stuff)

    Also all of them want me to travel to their cities (Florida, Seattle) and often give me a 1-2 hour slot on a specific day. No don’t come in Saturday, I have plans then. Come on Friday night at 6-8PM
    Jul 6, 2018 4
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      It’s hard to make this shit up
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Microsoft JsonBlob
      Leverage forecasting tools to deliver strategic business value is epic! Lol :). You should totally marry that girl. Do whatever it takes
      Jul 7, 2018
    • Facebook Starburt
      It’s funny how advanced degrees make people think they are somehow smarter. I’m sure someone at Google would be be able to pick that up that BS they teach at business school to suckers pretty fast.
      Jul 7, 2018
    • Intel LifeCareer
      Read through the whole post and this is the best joke of lol!
      Apr 7
  • Aon Hewitt Skjgvg
    There's going to be a difference between someone who has an MBA and has been making her career a priority vs someone who may have made other things priorities or has a different career track. I don't think it's an Indian vs non Indian thing.
    Jul 6, 2018 1
    • Microsoft JsonBlob
      From some of the responses OP has pasted here, they seem downright rude. Sample this - ‘I only talk to ceos not people like you’ or ‘you as an engineer won’t understand what I do’. I don’t think such talk has anything to do with prioritizing career. OP has come across some really weird women and is generalizing a little, or the ratio of single Indian men to single indian women is skewed heavily towards women. So the women are shitting all over Op
      Jul 7, 2018
  • Facebook supichai
    Marry a housewife. Else your life will be hell and you will get minimal sex. That too nothing funky for you like BJ.
    Jul 6, 2018 3
    • Dell Issaquah
      They don't have anything to do after coming here.They will start eating your head in 2-3 months
      Jul 6, 2018
    • LinkedIn / Eng Umgak
      If you don't give her the good dick, how can you expect her to go above and beyond for you..?
      Jul 9, 2018
    • Facebook supichai
      @Dell that is a easy problem to solve in many ways
      Jul 9, 2018
  • Google / Eng daviscyl_g
    Outstanding individuals of any ethnicity, in both man and woman, are mostly confident (or cocky). The best way to win them is to show higher social value (money/status/intelligence/education/beautiful women loves you/etc. whichever works for your target), and let them understand how beautiful life could be with you.
    Jul 6, 2018 2
    • New
      Xxx1234

      New

      PRE
      Apple
      Xxx1234more
      ☝️
      Jul 6, 2018
    • Facebook / Other
      XKLa50

      Facebook Other

      BIO
      Data scientist
      XKLa50more
      How does this accord with the existence of the Dunning Kruger effect?
      Jul 7, 2018
  • Amazon / Product Ulub72
    I’ve known many Indian Mba girls (non-Indian Mba woman here) and most of them were bright, confident, and do not give a shit. Some were married and others are married now to men who support their ambitions, goals, and life style. Some are still single but won’t settle for just “a gift of a man” So OP it’s your problem.

    There were girls who were focused on marriage (and trust me, not only Indian ones) but they got in arrangements during their school time and /or used school network to find an eligible match.
    Jul 6, 2018 1
    • MGM Resorts joTz32
      True. Women looking to get married for its own sake don't usually make it all the way through a bachelor's, and especially not through grad school.

      Maybe OP's issue is simply selection bias.
      Jul 6, 2018
  • Facebook Wert965
    MBA women aren’t going to take shit from anyone ( Indian women or otherwise). It comes from competing with aggressive men at school and work. I’ve dated both American and Indian MBA women and it goes with the territory.

    If you think they are cocky, ignore them and move on. There are so many women out there.
    Jul 6, 2018 1
    • Union Bank Fffv
      I agree with this post .. I m a mba Indian women .. you have to be very aggressive to be here .. we had a class of 28 percent women and couldn’t achieve 30 percent coz they couldn’t find women ..
      Jul 7, 2018
  • New syFj32
    Wow people who comment here automatically think OP is an asshole looking for a servant to get married. He clearly says the women he met expect to throw away his career for her. Which is shit be it a man or woman. But OP really needs to understand that’s an obvious reaction for being an Indian. Right from school you are taught “you don’t compromise for them let the compromise” mentality.
    Jul 6, 2018 0
  • Comcast HraNPs5647
    OP: Enough people are already giving you shit for being a sexist male patriarchial pig who can’t handle educated career women 😉 So I’ll take it in another direction and interpret your post at face value.

    Given the gender ratio in SV, finding a female partner is harder than getting in Google as SWE! When I lived there, perfect strangers in bars (and on dating sites) often stereotyped me negatively simply for being an indian man, assumed I was too traditional, sexist, creepy etc. And tbh there are Indian men like that who have ruined the reputation for everyone else. But still I think the gender ratio explains our experiences perfectly. No need to further dissect by race, degree, net worth etc. If you can be open minded to other cultures or live somewhere else, you have a larger dating pool to choose from. I did both, I’m in the happiest relationship of my life with a cute and smart engineer from the midwest. DM me if you need to talk privately for advice. Don’t take shit from radical SJWs. They’re not as open minded and non judgemental as they think they are. As mah brother snoop dogg says drop it like its hot 🔥

    Another aspect not pointed out by others - wtf are you doing talking to women on matrimonial websites AND dating non Indian stanford students?! Pick one lane and stick to it dude. You come across as a confused soul trapped between two cultures.

    And ofcourse if you are a sexist pig, stop being one 😛 I don’t know you so deferring judgement, and your post reads like a desperate cry for help, so I chimed in with my experience
    Jul 6, 2018 1
    • Google / Eng
      ‘Nutella’

      Google Eng

      PRE
      Google
      ‘Nutella’more
      OP
      I replied below but blind didn’t thread it. Tried DMing you. Blind doesn’t let me
      Jul 6, 2018