Location and happiness

Amazon / Other Ex-Banker
Feb 7, 2018 33 Comments

It's amazing how much of a difference location makes. In NYC, I was happy, energetic, and excited. The diversity, urban life, interesting people, and dating scene, were intoxicating.

In sharp contrast, I have been depressed and lethargic here in Seattle. Good friends have commented on my transformation; several have turned down Amazon jobs because of my Seattle experience.

Anyone else have a similar experience?

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TOP 33 Comments
  • Microsoft richardhea
    People are moving here from Delhi, Bangalore, Shanghai, and all sorts of overcrowded hellholes. Grow a pair and adapt.
    🍆
    Feb 7, 2018 6
    • Microsoft richardhea
      So reading comprehension is not a leadership principle?
      🍆
      Feb 7, 2018
    • Amazon / Mgmt 🤭MG!
      NYC is an overcrowded hellhole?
      Feb 7, 2018
    • Microsoft richardhea
      Absolutely. Have you been there? For more than a week, not as a tourist?
      🍆
      Feb 7, 2018
    • Amazon / Mgmt 🤭MG!
      I’m tracking, but still it’s no Bangalore or Shanghai.
      Feb 7, 2018
    • Microsoft richardhea
      Sure, NYC also has Arctic winters putting most of Alaska to shame.
      🍆
      Feb 7, 2018
  • SEVENROOMS / Eng DEADB33F
    Dude(tte) I had the exact same thing in Seattle and moved to NYC as a result. Mental health is more important than any job.
    Feb 7, 2018 3
    • Amazon / Other Ex-Banker
      OP
      Are you a lot happier in NYC? How different is your life now, compared to when you were in Seattle?
      Feb 7, 2018
    • SEVENROOMS / Eng DEADB33F
      Like night and day for the most part. I left before Seattle exploded even more than it already was and many of my old social circles diluted shortly after I left. Dating, very difficult in Seattle, is easier in NYC, very easy if you lower your standards enough Housing is smaller, but I don't have the urgency to leave so I can properly outfit my home like an adult.
      Feb 7, 2018
    • SEVENROOMS / Eng DEADB33F
      Also, food delivery here doesn't suck
      Feb 7, 2018
  • Microsoft ABtc
    Is the dating in New York great for guys but hard for girls? I’m a girl in Seattle and find that dating here is tiring. I’d move but I haven’t heard of great things from any of the major areas.
    Feb 7, 2018 5
    • Amazon / Other Ex-Banker
      OP
      NYC is harder for women because there are fewer straight decent men than women, and there's lot more competition. My dating life in NYC was so awesome that I thought I was in an adult Disneyworld.
      Feb 8, 2018
    • Microsoft ABtc
      Wow... haha I haven’t heard of it described as such for dating. That’s interesting. So you’ve dated a lot but it sounds like the quality wasn’t there...or else why not serious date someone by now after your fill of samples? Also are you late 20s/30s if you don’t mind stating.
      Feb 8, 2018
    • Amazon / Other Ex-Banker
      OP
      I'm early 30s. I don't want to get married, so NYC is perfect for me.

      Quality was great. There are so many options that it's hard to settle down. Good lord, this makes me sad, as I sit in a fucking Amazon building in soulless stagnant depressing Seattle.
      Feb 8, 2018
    • Microsoft ABtc
      Omg... that does sound quite depressing when you put it like that. Well if you don’t want to get married, do you want long term companion without title or just want to date around.? it sounds like you don’t have a hard time meeting girls, I’m sure bar hopping would work in Seattle as well. You just gotta change your mindset about Seattle, I think there’s lots of nice lovely girls here too.
      Feb 8, 2018
    • Amazon / Other Ex-Banker
      OP
      The quality and culture here doesn't do it for me. I'm not inspired like I was in NYC. Again, lot of people do like Seattle, so to each his own.

      Searle is great if you have a family.
      Feb 8, 2018
  • VMware troIIbu11y
    New York is a stinking, crowded, expensive dump. Seattle has turned into mini-New York unfortunately but within a 45 minute drive / ferry ride there are places where I can feel reasonably content. So, to each his own.
    Feb 7, 2018 0
  • Amazon / Mgmt 🤭MG!
    First of all, take care of yourself.

    The Seattle-Tacoma metro area has the second highest suicide attempt rate of the 33 largest metropolitan areas in the US.

    Seattle is tough to adapt to, but if you can find the right combination of self-care and a tight, supportive social circle, the quality of life here can be rewarding. Buy one or two SAD lights (the irony is not lost), try meditation, and consider reframing your outlook on winter gloominess.

    Lots of us slog around under the overcast skies, with the ember of spring and summer burning in the deepest part of our souls, patiently waiting for the amazingness just around the corner.

    If you just can’t make it, talk with your boss to see if you can work remote. If so, pack it up and head on back to NYC!

    In any case, keep your chin up. While we all do in fact have assholes, not all of us choose to live life as one. ;)
    Feb 7, 2018 0
  • Adobe cjEh51
    I think moving from NYC is especially hard. I experience the same when I migrated west.

    It has gotten better once I established a true network of friends, which took almost 3 years to do.

    I went from running half marathons, going out for drinks and dinners to becoming a lethargic hermit. Have gotten much better but my advice is, if you are unhappy, perhaps a move back is the best!
    Feb 7, 2018 0
  • Amazon KeepCalm1
    Moved from NYC to Seattle in July and feeing exactly the same way
    Feb 8, 2018 1
    • Amazon lLrS77
      is it more difficult to get into amzn nyc than seattle or herdon?
      Jun 6
  • New rbN4xT1
    I went from working in NYC to southern California, and I don't care for it. I sincerely miss being on the east coast and hope to move back in a few years. I hope you and your situation get better soon. Take care of yourself
    Feb 8, 2018 0
  • Salesforce / Sales
    git-wreckd

    Salesforce Sales

    PRE
    Enterprise
    BIO
    30+ yrs in the biz
    git-wreckdmore
    Weather keeps people indoors.
    Even the fish are on Prozac. 😆

    https://news.vice.com/article/seattle-area-salmon-are-loaded-with-anti-depressants-and-other-drugs-thanks-to-human-waste

    I moved here in 1985 and have tolerated the weather. Thinking about moving South 🌵🌞🦎
    Feb 7, 2018 0
  • Intel jdavola
    YES. Moved from east coast to Seattle and it was HARD. The weather was hard and I found it very hard to build relationships. Vitamin D, SAD lamp and exercise helped...but I ultimately moved away. My 2 cents: Try some of the suggestions folks mentioned and give them some time. If they don't help - life's too short. Go back to ny or try another city. Best of luck!
    Feb 7, 2018 0
  • Salesforce / Eng 🐙y.
    In Seattle:

    Ask doctor to test your vitamin D level. Most likely you need to boost it up significantly.

    Get your ass out of the office and out of the house. Go to work. Bike. Fight a hobo.

    Drive to other side of Cascades every now and then. Play in the snow.

    Take vacation in winter, go somewhere sunny

    Meet people. Not everyone here is a whiny vitamin D deficient sociopath ;) Some failed even that.
    Feb 7, 2018 0
  • Microsoft Qljb25
    Yes, I moved from Boston to CA, which wasn’t too bad, but Seattle has been depressing:(
    Feb 7, 2018 0
  • Microsoft / Eng essus
    leetcode to NYC sounds like.

    ONE LAST THING: does anyone care about bombs at all? I turned down an offer due to the bombing scene. That freaked me out.
    Feb 7, 2018 2
    • SEVENROOMS / Eng DEADB33F
      Egh, we average one a year. NBD. NYPD learns quick
      Feb 7, 2018
    • Microsoft / Eng essus
      not cool with that. will try to solve personal problems elsewhere then... elsewhere like redmond
      Feb 7, 2018
  • Amazon lLrS77
    how is the tech culture in nyc compared to seattle? is it more difficult to get into amzn nyc than seattle or herdon? i see more sde jobs available in nyc than herndon but it seems like people who want to switch to NYC have a lot of difficulty, why?
    Jun 6 0
  • Apple fldje
    I moved to Apple from another East coast city, it hasn't been fun for me either.
    Feb 7, 2018 0
  • LinkedIn RandomSwe
    Living in Seattle is like being in NYC winter all year long. Move to sunny California.
    Feb 7, 2018 0