Stay with current GF or pursue true love? Honest question.

Amazon FEAX60
Oct 17 169 Comments

About me:
YOE - 5
TC- $130k
Age - late 20's
Location - Seattle

The girl that I truly love lives in Italy. We've never properly dated due to distance, but we've gone one a couple of short trips together and it was amazing. She and I met traveling, and when we're together it's pretty explosive. We understand each other well and the sex is fantastic.

A few years ago I met my current girlfriend and we moved in together after a year. She is amazing and truly loves me. She is also smart, successful, good TC, and has a family that accepts me and is cool. However things have gotten super boring after living together, and she and I don't have the same passion as the Italian girl and me.

Deep down, I don't have the same feelings for my real-life gf as I do for the girl I love in Italy.

What do I do? Do I walk away from my amazing life in Seattle for a pipe-dream in Italy? We have a good life together here in Seattle, but I'm super bored and she doesn't excite me like the Italian girl. Seems like a huge risk. We have good TC and also REALLY good potential TC in the next 10 years. What if I walk away from my amazing life here and then it doesn't work out with the Italian girl I love.

Any advice would be awesome. My girlfriend is super cool and I feel bad for not being as attracted to her as another woman. She treats me so well, but I can't control my heart. Logically I should stay and enjoy my awesome life here, but on the other hand I'm only going to live once. Should I risk it all for un-fulfilled love?

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TOP 169 Comments
  • Also how's your TC 130k at Amazon with 5 YOE? ☻🤡
    Oct 17 15
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      Probably first person in your family to break out of poverty. Congrats on Cisco lol
      Oct 17
    • Microsoft / Manufacturing __Ranveer
      She is richer than you mate. lol What is up wiith the blatant racism? Who talks like that? And why the hate? Geez
      Oct 17
    • Anonymity brings out the 'best' in some people 😃. Now I'm pretty sure this post is a big joke. No girl on earth would be desperate enough to live with a tool like you.
      Oct 17
    • Motorola / Eng middlename
      Was gonna wish you luck until you turned out to be a fucking racist. Jump off a bridge and save both girls the trouble.
      Oct 18
    • Cisco Persistant
      Being the first person in the family to come out of poverty is a sign of great character. There is a thing or two you can learn from BlackGirl, OP.
      Oct 18
  • Cisco unit-test
    Why did you move in with this woman if you’re in love with someone else ?
    Oct 17 7
    • Cisco unit-test
      @statefarm. That’s horrible
      Oct 17
    • State Farm sweeeeee
      I said that tongue in cheek but it has some truth to it. If he truly loves the girl in Italy, why is he “wasting” his time with the one he found in Seattle instead of trying harder with the one he truly loves? Seems like OP only doesn’t really know why he stayed with Seattle girl except to save money. I’m sure the (I’d assume) consistent sex was good too.
      Oct 17
    • Bloomberg F.U. Money
      Haha @ Seattle being expensive and 150K being good TC.

      I would say either way move on from current girlfriend. It’s not fair to her to be your consolation prize. If you don’t have strong attraction, your relationship will fall apart eventually.

      I would also say forget about the Italian girl unless she moves here. That’s so long distance, it’s ridiculous. Moving there is even more ridiculous.
      Oct 17
    • Facebook maple dip
      More importantly why is he wasting HER time? Women have a limited time to find a husband so that's really despicable
      Oct 17
    • Cisco unit-test
      Limited time? Maybe if you want kids... otherwise no
      Oct 17
  • Riverbed Technology blindban
    Grass is greener on the other side. You will be bored with Italian pasta soon. You played your current gf. Karma will come around buddy.
    Oct 17 2
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      ya that's probably true. so you think i should stay?
      Oct 17
    • New / Eng 8=|)
      No, you should cut her loose
      Oct 17
  • Amazon Yeo
    If you live with Italian for 18 months you’ll tire of her too. It’s the newness. Not to be harsh, but realistically, your current girl is probably bored with you too but more importantly, you’re cheating, which creates distance in your current relationship. Be honest, stop with the high school secret texting and put in the work in at home or move on.
    Oct 17 1
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      thanks for the feedback Yeo. you're right.
      Oct 17
  • Salesforce lsSn48
    It’s likely the same thing would happen with the Italian girl if you were to live together for a year.
    Oct 17 1
    • Fast Enterprises / Eng nskcjx4
      OP doesn’t realize the sex you can’t have is always going to be more exciting, he’s gonna be working in a pasta shop in a few months
      Oct 17
  • Symantec / Data SYM123
    You should break up with your current GF because you're not being honest, and she doesn't deserve that (I'm assuming she's a good person).
    You can decide if you want to be with the Italian chick once you're single.
    I think you will get bored with her. But the main point is that you're being an asshole by not being honest with your current GF.
    Oct 17 4
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      you really think i should tell her about my true feelings? what good would it do except hurt her?
      Oct 17
    • Symantec / Data SYM123
      I didn't say you have to confess your feelings for the other chick. But you should break up with her.
      Oct 17
    • Memorial Sloan tiddies
      this is dumb advice, op didn’t act on anything. and it’s naive to think that in a long term relationship that both parties will never find themselves interested in someone else, the important thing is that they don’t indulge their desires.
      Oct 17
    • Symantec / Data SYM123
      Op is not just interested in the other chick. He has stronger feelings for her than he does for his gf. He says he truly loves her. Maybe it's true or maybe he's fantasizing. Either way he's not fully committed. He needs to break up with his current gf, so she has a fair chance with someone who loves her.
      Cheating is not just physical. Emotional cheating is worst.
      You may call my advice dumb, but that only speaks volumes of you and your low values.
      Oct 17
  • Oracle
    not_larry

    Oracle

    PRE
    Amazon
    not_larrymore
    Dump both of them. Date guys.
    Oct 17 1
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      i'd rather kill myself. thanks though.
      Oct 17
  • Lyft simball
    You will 100% get bored of the Italian girl once you live together
    Oct 17 2
    • Neurocrine Neurocrine
      Why is that?
      Oct 17
    • Fast Enterprises / Eng nskcjx4
      Inverse correlation between number of times you nut in a girl and level of excitement you feel around her
      Oct 17
  • New / Data
    LNBk35

    New Data

    PRE
    Google
    LNBk35more
    If you’ve never seriously dated her then you don’t know her and you’re not in love.
    Oct 17 4
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      ya...that might be true. but i think of her all the time and we've gone on some trips together and it was mutually amazing. we secretly text all the time and i think we are in love together. even if it might be superficial love.
      Oct 17
    • Fast Enterprises / Eng nskcjx4
      You should chase the pasta maker just so your poor Seattle girl can find someone who actually cares about her
      Oct 17
    • Amazon salores
      You are cheating on your girlfriend. let her go and don’t waste her time. It’s cruel.
      Oct 17
    • Google swinglyf
      Yeah, cheating isn’t cool! There might be other alternatives if you are both inclined to open the relationship up
      Oct 18
  • Netflix I🤳🏻guy
    It’s not true love. It’s infatuation. Infatuation doesn’t last. Just like faithfulness to your current GF apparently.
    Oct 17 6
    • Netflix I🤳🏻guy
      I guess that bit was lost in your OP. You mentioned you’ve been with your current girl for a few years. So when did this hookup with the Italian girl happen? If you’re faithful, the presumably before. And after all this time you’re still thinking about her? Damn...

      Unless you can be committed and hooked in with your current relationship, then it’s really not fair to her.
      Oct 17
    • Amazon Yeo
      OP, secret texts aren’t 100% faithful.
      It’s cheating.
      Oct 17
    • Netflix I🤳🏻guy
      Yeah. In a way you’ve already betrayed your girl. Gotta 💩 or get off the 🚽. If every waking moment makes you think of this Italian girl, then end your relationship and make a go for it. It’s not fair to drag things on when you’re mentally not there for your GF.

      It’s just one of those things, dude. Imagine yourself as a senior citizen and ask your future self what you would regret more?

      As it stands it seems like you’re completely into this chick. As a someone with a few gray hairs on my head, I’ve learned the lesson of the crazy hot matrix. But we all gotta learn our own way. Be bold. But don’t drag collateral damage along for the ride. Be genuine and be fair.
      Oct 17
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      @netflix - really appreciate your advice. Out of curiosity, what’s the lesson of the crazy hot matrix?
      Oct 18
    • Netflix the.oa
      Punch “crazy hot matrix” into YouTube.
      Oct 19
  • Microsoft iamletired
    You sure it wouldn't be the same with the italian once you moved in together?
    Oct 17 2
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      i think about that all the time. i'm really not sure. honestly it probably would be...right? i dunno. this is the first time ive ever lived with anyone.
      Oct 17
    • Uber crbn
      It’ll be exactly that. It’ll take a lot less than one year too. Going out on a limb here, but you probably have a lot more to talk about with your ‘High TC’ girlfriend.
      Oct 17
  • Intel Intel-guy
    You know what... That Italian babe is thinking just the same but about another guy. Does that change your question?🤔
    Oct 17 6
    • Intel Intel-guy
      Lol... This is so funny from an outsider perspective... But I can feel your pain. It's like working a sweat shop life at Apple versus easy going one at Intel...
      Oct 17
    • Google dumbfcuk
      Seriously!! What a comparison!
      Oct 17
    • Intel Intel-guy
      I know it's not a good one but what da heck!
      Oct 17
    • Google swinglyf
      Why don’t you keep the current situation then, and use your other relationship for occasional excitement?
      Oct 18
    • Google dumbfcuk
      Duh.. that's whst he is doing now.. but bro wants more!! :)
      Oct 19
  • Rubrik eptE65
    Please leave your current gf since she deserves a better boy than you.
    Oct 17 7
    • OceanX / Eng openureyes
      Addicted to your D, then I think she would leave you soon, to find a better D with a better TC...
      Oct 17
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      She used to be with a guy with bigger TC and smaller D. Said it was miserable. I guess not all girls are into nerds
      Oct 18
    • OceanX / Eng openureyes
      So size does matter
      Oct 18
    • OceanX / Eng openureyes
      Also it seems that, TC is inversely propositional to D.size()
      Oct 18
    • OceanX / Eng openureyes
      Is your current GF asian?
      Oct 18
  • Google SwoleSeoul
    🍿

    (Edited)
    Oct 17 5
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      i put TC at the top
      Oct 17
    • Google SwoleSeoul
      My bad. Gf's TC?
      Oct 17
    • Microsoft / Manufacturing __Ranveer
      And Italian grill’s TC
      Oct 17
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      current gf TC - 80k
      Current gf TC after she finishes her PHD - 150k entry level
      Italy girl TC - maybe 35k USD. trash, i know.
      Oct 17
    • Facebook tomorro
      35k USD is amazing TC in Italy. Young people there earn 20k
      Oct 17
  • Atlassian d@t_person
    Had the girls switched places u would also end up being bored living with Italian girl. It’s always more passionate with her because u aren’t in your normal environment and way of life working. U are on vacation so u don’t have the real stressed of life waying down on u. She would probably get bored of u as well.
    Stick with strong tc girl
    Oct 17 2
    • Intel Intel-guy
      This ^ makes sense! Love the one who loves you...
      Oct 17
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      thanks Atlassian. really appreciate your response. you bring up really good points.
      Oct 17
  • Google / Product
    memegenlvr

    Google Product

    PRE
    Google
    memegenlvrmore
    Beware of the geographic cure. The unrest you feel is likely within yourself. I suggest opening up to you gf about your desire to identify mutual things you can engage in that taps into your 'passion' centers. Don't just Netflix and chill, everyone is boring at that stage.
    Oct 17 0
  • Google / Eng 🍑☁️
    Break up. Don't stay in a relationship you're not super stoked about just because of momentum.

    Whether you should pursue things with the Italian is a whole different question.
    Oct 17 4
    • Salesforce Jef Besoz
      Smartest reply here. Regardless of what happened with the Italian girl? It is clear you’re not happy with your current gf. Be a man and break up with her and save her the years of regret
      Oct 17
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      @salesforce - I wish it was that easy. We live together...have a pet together...our families have met.
      Oct 18
    • Google / Eng 🍑☁️
      Yeah, but you aren't satisfied with your relationship. What, are you gonna wait to get divorced in 10 years? Don't waste both of your lives just because you don't want to have a scary conversation
      Oct 19
    • Salesforce Bill Gatez
      Oh my god your families have met?! How could you ever break up?! FYI. People break up and get divorced all the time. Why? Because they decide that correcting their unhappiness trumps the opinion of others.

      At the end of the day. You hold the key to your happiness and will have no one to blame but yourself when you do end up a fat 50 year old divorcée.
      Oct 19
  • Salesforce Bill Gatez
    “Show me a hot girl and I’ll show you someone tired of f’ing her.”

    Grass is always greener, and all relationships get stale over time. Gotta work at it or gtfo.
    Oct 18 1
    • Cisco unit-test
      Same goes for hot guys tbh
      Oct 18
  • Deloitte / Product
    V.Y

    Deloitte Product

    BIO
    Hi There! How can I help?
    V.Ymore
    Oct 17 1
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      they obviously just banged. jeff's a pimp.
      Oct 17
  • Cisco unit-test
    Your Italian gf has some sexy Italian stallions on the side FYI
    Oct 17 1
    • Amazon FEAX60
      OP
      ya i'm aware she has boyfriends over there. whenever we text we talk about our significant others as a way to catch up and ask about life. she says she doesn't like italian guys though because they're chauvinistic and insecure mommas boys. the romantic, swooning acts are just for show.
      Oct 17

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