Hi there, Blind! Coming here for a bit of workplace romance guidance! I’m an Ops Manager (female), and I have a little bit of a crush on this dude from our analytics team. I’ve really only interacted with him professionally although I’ve tried to lightly flirt with him a few times (compliments on appearance/some of the work he’s done for my team). I don’t know how to talk to him about non-work related things, and I’d like to learn more about him. So, here’s the question: how should a girl approach a guy at work in this situation? We don’t work together enough to have daily or even weekly conversations, so I don’t have much of an excuse to talk to him. I’ve been thinking about just asking him to grab a drink after work, but I don’t know much about him (like if he’s even single) so that could be weird. I also don’t know if he’s super awkward or if I’m even a blip on his radar. I’d appreciate any help or thoughts here :)
Drink after work all day. If he’s not single, he’d let you down gracefully or still do a drink so you could find out more.
Or gay
Risk it all - Just tell him he should take you out sometimes. Life is short
Above all be patient. See if you can talk to him at an office happy hour. Or try to leave the office at the same time he does and strike up a conversation on your way out. Long game would be to try and observe who he hangs out with in the office and make an effort to get to know them as well. Don't be creepy or crazy about this but you want to create opportunities where a conversation is possible. If you have the opportunity though by all means just be direct and ask if he wants to get a drink. He'll probably say yes.
This is good advice! I’ve been trying the long con for about 2 months now. It’s just hard given the lack of opportunity to talk. I’ll keep looking for windows of opportunity! Thank you!
Lol this advice is for men. If a girl asks, the guy will probably just say yes.
How ya doin?
As a dude I’m really oblivious sometimes when someone’s into me. Even if someone is into me I deny the signals I see. If you’re dealing with someone like me I’d suggest being the initiator. Ask him out for drinks or go on a hike or something, and insinuate that it’s a date.
But wouldn’t it be weird for someone to ask you on a date when they don’t even know you? I’m worried about coming off as weird or being stuck on a hike and finding that there are no common interests to discuss
Don’t overthink it. Pull the trigger. Worse than being told he’s married/gay/not interested in work chicks is finding out someone else asked him first and he said yeah.
Organize a work happy hour and invite him along with other people. That will help with concealing your true intentions :) then at said happy hour you can do your mingling and sleuthing. Brilliant idea I know you're welcome.
+1 on this. Was going to post the same.
I.. Is he indian? (Please say yes even if he is not)
No guy will mind if you cold call them casually for a drink after work. Worst case is he will politely reject you.
#metoo
If men did this to OP and he wasn’t cute or handsome enough, she would say a creepy guy stalked her at work. Look at all the different suggestions people made below. These are all stalking ideas which deserves a restraining order. And for some reason if op thought, yeah maybe the guy isn’t that creepy so goes for a drink or coffee. And few weeks later she doesn’t like him anymore and slaps him a metoo story. Double standard hypocrite.