Texas to Bay Area

ViaSat igloop
Mar 27 67 Comments

Got an offer from one of the unicorn in Bay Area. Have been dreaming of joining top tier companies but after looking up on COL, I am debating whether I should move. 2YOE

Current Status
Pros:
1. Company WLB is great
2. Pays 90k in Texas so it’s pretty decent
3. Living in a house 3b2b for only $1300
Cons:
1. The work they do is not really modern and I am afraid after a few years I am going to lag behind even more
2. My wife is currently finishing up here studies which would take another 2 years
3. Would want to fly back every week to be with my wife for weekends(Fly Thursday night WFH Friday, fly back to Bay early Monday).
Would cost about $1600 per month

If I accept the offer
Pros:
1. Pays good: TC 190k
2. Is a well known brand
3. Better for future career
Cons:
1. High COL
2. Leaving my wife behind

Blinders, what would you choose?

157 VOTES SELECT ONLY ONE ANSWER
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TOP 67 Comments
  • Cisco cust24577
    If you got the job once you can get it again. Just let your wife know she’s costing you $200k for her ‘studies’. Or alternatively, ask the unicorn if you can work remote for the first year. Or ask for a relocation bonus and take it
    Mar 27 7
    • New LGwK11
      That's a super shitty way to put it. You know very well that $200k doesn't go nearly as far in SF as it does anywhere else. You must be single if you think she's a burden to him.
      Mar 27
    • Cisco cust24577
      I don’t think she’s a burden, but they are missing out on $200k (2 years x (190k - 90k)), which is unfortunate as 200k growing over 20 years is a lot of money. Maybe he can ask to work remote from Texas at 90k with the option/obligation to move over to CA in two years at 210k? I recommend he stay because ain’t nobody want fight or distance with their wife, definitely not worth the pain. Just an unfortunate situation
      Mar 27
    • Salesforce tensorchic
      Wtf. They are not missing out on any money. The wife finishing her studies is better for their net worth in the long run. And honestly, that money is just the cost of being married. If some guy told me I was costing him 200k in order to "stay" with me through my 2 year Masters, I'd ask him to leave. He'll probably end up spending that cash in lost income, flight tickets, therapy and dating in future anyway.
      Mar 28
    • Cisco cust24577
      Well yes, the opportunity cost of not taking the job in order to focus on her schooling is $200k, or let’s say $140k taking taxes into account. $140k growing over 20 years at 5% is ~$400k, so yes, her education is costing them to miss out on $400k. In return they get to stay together, be just as happy, and she gets to be a vet in Texas. It’s not an insult or a threat to his wife, simply a reality of the decision. If they are both ok with that l, then obviously her education and the pros of stay are worth more to them than $400k.
      Mar 28
    • New LGwK11
      You aren't considering expenses at all. The COL will be double. They won't be able to save $140k - that's ridiculous.
      Mar 28
  • Microsoft gfba68
    $190k in SF is not good money
    Mar 27 4
    • Cisco cust24577
      Uggghhh explain how 90k in TX is better than 190k in CA
      Mar 27
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      Yeah. Mind elaborating?
      Mar 27
    • Airbnb / Eng Misotheist
      State income tax
      Mar 27
    • T-Mobile Digem12
      State income tax, cost of living, and cost of housing will eat all that income up quickly. Having moved from TX to San Fran and back again, I can attest! Tech jobs and career growth much better in SF than Texas. Texas has higher property tax but lower cost of living. You won't find a one bedroom apartment in the immediate Bay Area for less than 2k. Can wife change schools? UC Berkeley, UCSF are great schools. Flying back home like that is expensive and will likely leave you burned out, I did that for 6 months and it's tough in the best of circumstances.
      Mar 28
  • Apple FAANG =3
    Why can't you take your wife with you?
    Mar 27 1
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      She’s finishing up her studies.
      Mar 27
  • Dell xlord
    Ask yourself, would you like to spend more time with your wife, help her in her daily chores and studies or would you choose a better life alone on weekdays? And flying on weekends is not a good idea bro, you will also need to relax out after week long work. My suggestion, be together here or there doesnt matter, ask company to make adjustments for you. If they really want you, they will try resolve it out. Or else the jobs and world is not ending. Upto you now.
    Mar 27 7
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      Haven’t talk about this with her. Just got the offer and I am on an interview trip. Don’t want to do this over the phone. Yeah...my company is a noname and the tech stack and mind set is just so out of date.
      Mar 27
    • Dell xlord
      Talk to your wife, make a decision you both agree upon. Ofcourse moving to bay area will expose you to more opportunities and may be for her too in future. Dont know whats your and her career background. Another thing, taxes in bay are high and so is the housing. Do the maths and find out overall does it all work out for you, you should not be ending up having almost nill balance at the end of the month. Same TC you are getting offered is what I have and by the year end I dont end up making a lot of savings but I have made investments like bought a apartment, luxury car etc. If I haven't had tha probably i have had extra 3k per month in my bank.
      Mar 27
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      Thanks man for all the advice.
      Mar 27
    • Wipro
      JohnnyCa$h

      Wipro

      PRE
      Apple
      BIO
      Citizen and democrat
      JohnnyCa$hmore
      Did that while working for big 5 consulting traveling all week and home on weekend. After a year, I was burnt out and lost the emotional connection. Not worth it
      Mar 27
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      I won’t be traveling for the whole week though.
      Mar 27
  • Facebook PeFn27
    Not worth it in my opinion. Wait for your wife to be ready.
    Mar 27 2
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      The point is when she finishes her studies. She going for academia which there is no school in the Bay Area for her research.
      Mar 27
    • Facebook PeFn27
      Oh I see. Look into Seattle or NYC. You can get a high tc there too
      Mar 27
  • Pinterest yhmhcep
    190 is nothing in the Bay
    Mar 27 12
    • Pinterest yhmhcep
      Right. Remember, most of them are immigrants and a lot of them from poor countries/areas. They think this is the norm. A lot of brainwash as well..
      Mar 27
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      So you’re saying non immigrants are not willing to come to Bay Area?
      Mar 27
    • Pinterest yhmhcep
      Not saying exactly that. A lot of people dreaming to move out of here.. but immigrants are willing to accept lower standards, because life will be better than what they used to have ..
      Mar 27
    • Airbnb plier
      Immigrants also need sponsorships for their green cards. Such sponsorship is abundant in Bay Area but rare in other states.
      My American friends have mostly moved back to their home state upon reaching their next life stage, be it as marriage, child-bearing and child starting schools. My Asian friends either stayed or moved to LA, which is basically the same thing as here
      Mar 27
    • Pinterest yhmhcep
      Good point! Bay area js for making money (if you know how), and not for living
      Check out this post! "“200k salary and still broke” (Money)"
      https://usapi.teamblind.com/s/B3Pi1yWt
      Mar 27
  • Google mcml
    If you want to work for big tech (and I don’t say this in a condescending way, none of these companies are all that special except for benefits, resume padding and bragging rights), you gotta find a place that works for both of you.

    NY / Bay Area / Boston have a pretty good mix of academic work and tech companies so it’s almost impossible that you won’t find a city that works for both of your careers. Just talk to people and ask around. Unless your wife’s getting a PhD, look into transfers between colleges.

    Flying between Bay Area and TX is going to make you miserable and I wouldn’t advise it but plenty of consultant types are forced to do it so it’s not like it hasn’t been done before.

    Promos etc are also a pain in the ass if you end up being under leveled and move to a big co mid 30s (which is very likely if you’re working for a smaller company).
    Mar 27 5
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      She’s a veterinarian with a PHD. There’s only 26 schools with vet schools and all in the middle of nowhere😢
      Mar 27
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      Also the promo part is also what scares me. I been down leveled fir this offer because the company doesn’t recognize my company.
      Mar 27
    • Cisco cust24577
      How about UC Davis? They have a great vet school, the drive to the bay will be a pain, but if you ca work from Sac or Davis it’s pretty inexpensive
      Mar 27
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      UC Davis is like MIT to vets. Yeah, she will apply but it’s really tough to get a faculty position there.
      Mar 27
    • Cisco cust24577
      True, very true! Good luck!!
      Mar 27
  • Netflix ycitt
    How much of $190k is paper money? Bunch of the unicorns are highly over valued at this point in time but monetarily there could be no upside. $190k - COL adjustment - Adjustments to bloated valuation is the right income for you in Bay Area. However, Bay Area is unique in terms of culture.. everyone is trying to use the next set of technologies and trying/may be over trying to solve a problem creatively. So, despite inconveniences it’s worth it to pursue Bay Area opportunity!
    Mar 28 0
  • Salesforce tensorchic
    Have you considered long distance?. If she's in school she probably has no time anyway to chill out. If you develop your career now, then in 2 years when she graduates you'll be in a better place to be flexible for her as well. Anyhow the Masters is going to be intense.
    Mar 28 0
  • Apple HTWn35
    U will be paying 10% state tax, 2-3k a month on rent and lot of time in traffic
    Mar 27 3
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      So 90k in Texas is still better?
      Mar 27
    • Apple HTWn35
      Yes... you should try getting a raise though. Our household income is 350k spend 3 hrs a day in traffic. 10k fir house plus school. No time to enjoy life. Foret life no time to sip a cup of tea with out feeling rushed
      Mar 27
    • Apple HTWn35
      Also, traffic is bad on weekends as well 😂
      Mar 27
  • Soothe hahawtf
    You’re underpaid in Texas. Find somewhere else to work in your area.
    Mar 27 3
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      Unfortunately, I am in middle of nowhere in Texas. COL is super low but also job opportunity. If I was to find a job in Texas, it would be in Austin but that would still mean leaving my wife behind and going back every weekend.
      Mar 27
    • Netflix / Eng fhufvjkgs
      This is still better than moving to the bay area and traveling from there every weekend. I'd suggest try to get into a good company in Austin as a stepping stone and move to the bay area after 2 years. There are plenty of good companies in Austin
      Mar 30
    • ViaSat jakwjwj
      Is indeed considered a good company in Austin?
      Mar 30
  • Zynga Hola123
    What company is this? And what is the breakdown? What is the level? Hard to answer with just TC.
    Mar 28 0
  • Amgen yiXR75
    I mean it will suck for a year while she finishes her studies but think about military families: it’s temporary and they make it work.
    Mar 27 0
  • Airbnb plier
    I’m sorry, what is COL?
    Mar 27 2
  • Verizon ucHe57
    Your current tc is 90?
    Mar 28 1
    • ViaSat igloop
      OP
      Yes. I live in a low COL place.
      Mar 28
  • Magic Leap Leaper17
    Other factors to consider: Experiences and lifestyle in the Bay Area. Achieving your dreams (you mentioned that you are dreaming of working in a top tier tech company). Everyone has had to sacrifice something to achieve their dream. Your wife could also visit you as well, and you can visit other great vacation spots in California. Even if you experience the Bay Area for 1-2 years, you would know what it is like. After she finishes school, you both have another time period in your life to figure out where you want to settle.

    I have had coworkers that commuted weekly from Canada, Seattle or other cities, to work at companies on the Bay Area. Once you build up trust with your team, there are options on creating less travel, etc.
    Mar 30 0
  • Google youngturd
    Take it. The doubling of your pay will take care of the COL increase.
    Mar 27 0
  • Capital One YhAs70
    Didficult. You have to take a call.
    Mar 27 0
  • New / Other AuntHilda
    You can take your wife to bay area and have her credits transferred.
    Mar 27 0
  • Cloudera / Other
    pp12

    Cloudera Other

    PRE
    IBM, VMware
    BIO
    Ivy league MBA, IIT
    pp12more
    At least 2.5k for 1 bedroom apt
    Mar 27 0

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