Unrealistic Ambitions

Uber guivvh we
Apr 26 35 Comments

I am L4 eng with 3 yoe and 29 years of age ( started working late). But some day I want to be a director of engineering or a CTO.
I am below average at coding ( not sure how I cleared Uber interview in 2016 when hiring bar was high ) compared to my team mates who seem to know everything. I see other people who are good at something.
I am not a good speaker or have people skills or particularly good at architecture or any other talent for that matter.
I used to think hard work is the key to success but I cannot work 24/7 to overcome my weaknesses.
I feel I will never achieve my ambitions, this gets me depressed and suicidal.
What happens to an average engineer in this field? Or should I lower my aim to fit my skills and just live out an average life .... 😔

TC: 250K

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TOP 35 Comments
  • New kvzR50
    Why can’t you improve?
    Apr 26 4
    • Uber guivvh we
      OP
      I can try, but time is limited I don't have more than 24 hrs in a day
      Apr 26
    • Google
      tsukino

      Google

      BIO
      w
      tsukinomore
      stop trying to do everything, or else face mediocrity
      Apr 26
    • New kvzR50
      The problem is that you’re focusing on other people, don’t compare and you win. Beat yourself from yesterday.
      Apr 26
    • Uber / Eng 2BJohn
      I like the saying : beat yourself from yesterday.
      Apr 26
  • Deloitte broadway74
    Also you are making $250k, delete the blind app and go work out or do something besides work. Most ppl would kill to be in your shoes
    Apr 26 3
    • Uber guivvh we
      OP
      250K at age 29 is average in Bay area. Only put it to avoid "TC or GTFU" comment
      Apr 26
    • Deloitte broadway74
      From google “Here's the breakdown across the Bay Area: San Francisco: Median household income $96,265, middle-class income range $64,177 to $192,530.”
      Apr 26
    • Microsoft bigsixhero
      I think the better comparison is to what the average SDE QoL is in another city. OP could just be living in DC/NC/Seattle doing the same work and live a better life.
      Apr 27
  • Google
    tsukino

    Google

    BIO
    w
    tsukinomore
    if you can consistently focus on deliberate improvement in one particular niche for 20+ hours/week many years in a row, you will almost certainly reach the top x% in that area by age 40 - the hard part is choosing something to focus on and sticking to it
    Apr 26 0
  • Deloitte broadway74
    Not everyone can or has to make it to the top. Some people stay as analyst or developers, a medium percentage go to manager roles, from there even smaller to the top. Think of it like a funnel going up. I would suggest finding something outside work you enjoy
    Apr 26 3
    • Uber guivvh we
      OP
      Yeah but that's the thing. I want to be somebody, leave a legacy, but when I see current Uber management, leaders, senior engineers I feel so fucking stupid and useless
      Apr 26
    • Deloitte broadway74
      If you work with top ppl you will rarely be the star, if you want to be the star or at the top go somewhere less competitive. I’m not saying you can’t get there but it takes time too. You are 29 with 3 years exp. Chill. You have lots to learn and plenty of time.
      Apr 26
    • Facebook Kasparov
      Why do you want to be somebody or leave a legacy? I think the wisdom of the ages shows that is not the key to happiness. Learn to like yourself between your ears and you will be on the path to contentment

      You’ve got the air in your lungs, sunshine around you, and the freedom of your mind.
      Apr 26
  • Amazon isartor
    If the "depressed and suicidal" part is true (i.e. you really meant it), then forget coding skills, public speaking skills. Treat the depression first!
    Apr 27 1
    • Microsoft / Product
      Brazuka

      Microsoft Product

      PRE
      Bain & Company
      Brazukamore
      Good point
      Apr 27
  • Facebook gluteus
    I'm smelling impostor syndrome. You didn't accidentally get to where you are. Uber would have fired you.
    Apr 26 1
    • Uber guivvh we
      OP
      I got lucky with good managers
      Apr 26
  • New xovan
    I don't know anything about engineering fields and jobs but I do know one thing about life. I know that when it comes to achieving goals and having Ambitions it's important to realize your strengths and weaknesses which is what you have done which is really good now I think that in order to achieve your Ambitions you just have to be smart about where you position yourself in terms of your strengths and weaknesses if you're not good at coding then do something that you know you did at and if you don't know what you are good at and start exploring until you find something that might seem a bit late considering the fact that you've already decided to be an engineer but maybe there are other aspects of an engineer that you could be
    Apr 26 0
  • New worlz
    So you can launch your own company and pick whatever title you want. You can be both CTO and director of engineering at the same time! Titles don't mean much, figure out what kind of work you want to be doing later and start paddling in that direction.
    Apr 26 0
  • New / Eng abuhr3i
    To make you feel better I'm 35 early L5 with TC 270k. My career started at 33!
    Apr 26 3
    • Oracle / Eng yoy-
      What do you mean by career started at 33? Did you get into tech @ 33?
      Apr 26
    • New / Eng abuhr3i
      I got a PhD, before that I had some work experience which I don't really count
      Apr 26
    • Oracle / Eng yoy-
      Congrats. You are doing really well for yourself!
      Apr 26
  • Deloitte RockyBalbo
    Looks like imposter syndrome to me. Getting into Uber is not easy. Their interview process is structured to weed out weak candidates. As you start climbing up the ladder you are bound to meet people who are smarter than you. You got to accept this fact that there are always going to be people at the two ends of the spectrum. Internalize this. Only then would you be able to get these negative thoughts out of your head. Most of the so called experts started at an early age and grinded on it for years together to reach where they are today. So, if you want to become the best you got to be able to put in the time and effort . Unless you are a rocket scientist inventing out of the world shit, most of the things that most people work on, can be achieved by an average Joe with sufficient time and effort. Also, you got to be hyper focused on one thing. Don't meddle yourself into lot of different things unless you are Leonardo da Vinci. Concentrate on one area of expertise and give it all you got. Finally at the end of the day, you just got one life to do what you love. Ignore the noise and clutter and believe in yourself.
    You can do it !
    P.S : watch this video from Steve jobs
    https://youtu.be/kYfNvmF0Bqw
    Apr 26 0
  • New / Design
    tacosmello

    New Design

    PRE
    Raizlabs, MullenLowe
    tacosmellomore
    This made me wince. Average? Really? First of all, you’re profoundly above “average”

    This app is above average

    Next, let’s dissect your weird judgements and shit on yourself,

    Stop getting so down...

    You’re fucking amazing in the grande scheme of things. You’re in the drivers’ seat of humanity.

    Stop trying to align yourself to some abstract bullshit dick measuring contest you call “work” and have a real goal. There’s a reason you go to work every day and solve problems. Do it and have conviction behind your decisions.

    Or start your own thing.
    Apr 26 0
  • Amazon / Eng KHCr70
    Relax. I'm in almost exactly the same position as you career wise. L4 soon to be L5. 3 YOE in dev role. 32 years old. Much less TC than you though.

    Even if you keep your job and get promoted every 5 years you'll do very well over the long term
    Apr 26 4
    • Amazon 22/7
      Uber L4 is Amazon L5. So, he’s one level above! And Uber has higher bar as well.
      Apr 26
    • Amazon / Eng KHCr70
      I think the point is still valid?
      Apr 26
    • Amazon 22/7
      ActualPoint := 0.6 x YourPoint
      Apr 26
    • Amazon 22/7
      So yah, somewhat valid
      Apr 26
  • New / Eng abuhr3i
    It's all about right positioning to differtiate yourself. Don't think that your colleagues who "know everything" are going to reach to the top.
    Apr 26 0
  • Google praise
    2016, the bar had already gone down. I think it began somewhere in early-mid 2015 when Uber ramped up hiring aggressively.
    Apr 26 0
  • Microsoft / Product
    Brazuka

    Microsoft Product

    PRE
    Bain & Company
    Brazukamore
    Relax man, you're in a company with smart people. You're likely above average if you compared to the industry as a whole. And with stamp of a few uber years under you belt it shouldnt be difficult to become an engineering manager in a startup or less reputable company.
    Apr 26 0
  • Bloomberg EVALSlayer
    Keep persevering and doing your best and things will definitely start to converge. And optimize for happiness. F legacy.
    Apr 26 0