Been seeing a man 1-2x a week and on date 6. I highly doubt they’re seeing anyone else from what they’ve said and how they’ve behaved and so we’ve spent the night together. How do I progress the relationship forward? I would like it to become serious.
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- New taggedYou ask about what they think about being in a relationship. I typically wait until they ask to be exclusive.
I feel like guys want to think they’re getting a good deal, and when they’re pressured to be in a relationship, it takes away the attraction.
But you should talk about it. If he says he’s not ready then you should be ready to lower his ranking in your life. Continue to look for guys who are more available.
The minute you lower him, he’s going to feel it. If he likes you he’s going to work harder for you. If not, then you get your answer.
- Morgan Stanley jhsichaaYou've been seeing him 1-2x a week and you're on date 6. So you've only been seeing him for a week?
- CA Technologies e2be2rWhen dates stop becoming dates and become regular plans. Go through the casual phase before getting to the serious phase. Ask him what his thoughts on commitment are.
- Apple h4krBell3Can’t you just ask him over dinner?
Hey, what do you think about being exclusive? I like you a lot!
- I once read that men are wired to chase and that, once they feel like they can have the woman, they lose interest. I've seen it play out a few times. Have you considered a medium term strategy of not letting him feel like he can count on a relationship with you? And in the long run, accepting his desire for a relationship only begrudgingly?
- Microsoft phadIt depends on his personality and the chemistry between you two. Imho the two approaches that work the best are:
Ease it up through a more meaningful date, like sharing stuff you or he likes, it's easier to be in the zone for that talk after it not being only cafes,bars, parks, etc.
Or just straight up say it, though you gotta know if he likes that dry and to the point approach.
Oh, and in my experience, when it doesn't work that well is during or after you spend the night. Hormones are flowing, mind is cloudy, saying yes is easy without truly meaning it.