35 and single ☹️- Need advice/plan/suggestion
Guys/Girls - need honest advice/help Having hard time finding someone decent looking for long term relationship /wife material. It’s driving me crazy and depressing. P.S. I have no game - I am no Brad Pitt but on the other hand I’m no fluffy(hilarious guy) Ones I find are 1.Not decent looking, trust me my bar is low in bar area. 2.No job/ no education or ones who wanna go on dates for free drinks. 3.Totally out of shape. I am in decent shape, decent looking brown dude. Summer goal is get back to my old BMI < 15 Need actionable plan - what am I doing wrong🤦🏽♂️🤷🏽♂️ Summarizing action plan from comments. -Moved Shaadi.com to number one -Leetcode -Move to SoCal or NY -Gym - this is help with confidence both personal and work -Parents or Shaddi -Socialize and make female friends -Move to Fremont -Lawyer up - not sure why tho! -Join dance classes- not doing that - sounds gay to me.
It's like looking for gold mind in the space, good looking women in Bay area is quite low
Move to NY or LA
Please do the needful! Your parents are the best resource for this. Please kindly revert with results. Good luck!
1). Hit the gym 2). Hit the Leetcode 3). Lawyer up
if you are Indian from India call parents and get arranged marriage. you’ll find educated girls in India who are willing to move to bay area. they have high expectations too so going to gym and getting fit and good looking is a must. get a personal trainer and follow good diet and nutrition
you can also find someone good looking with no job and support her higher education needs. there has to be some trade off if you are not Brad Pitt
Some non-jokey advice: 1). Give it time. Finding the right person is hard, many people struggle with this in the Bay Area, you aren’t alone. 2). Go on lots of dates - dating is a skill you can build just like anything else. Focus on presenting your best self and also quickly figuring out whether the other person is a good match for you. 3). Go out and do stuff, make friends, especially girls. Girls love playing matchmaker so when they see that you’re not a complete shitlord, they’ll set you up with their friends.
What can I tell you bud. I am 34 and attractive, but celibate as fuck. Lol. But for some reason I am content. I get a feeling some sort of a spiritual growth is in order for you.
Sign up for dance lessons. Something weekly. Swing, waltz, samba, foxtrot, anything like that. Make friends with people in the classes. Get competent. Go to dances. Meet more people, make more friends. It's fun. It's not a solution in itself, but it's a foundation for a solution.
This is good advice. I go for swing dancing once a week at a local swing dance club. I am the most popular guy there lol. Everybody likes me. And I like this one girl there, but each time I dance with her, and only her, I get nervous lol. It is so fucked up. I've been going dancing there for almost a year but I haven't been able to ask her out. lol. It is sad.
Hahaha come on man. Do the needful. Asking a girl out is hard when you're 14 not in your 20s
the in-shape ones who are decent-looking with a job and educated by Bay Area standards are making more than 200k at your age of 35 (plus they're probably not single), so if your primary criteria are socioeconomic status and physical attractiveness, you will be dating up and likely fall short of matching the other party's expectations in the social climbers' game
All I need is good 4 months of leetcode to bump my TC - working on it buddy.
or try to find someone based on genuine connection and emotional compatibility, rather than class and money