Early 30s male. I work as an engineer in the bay area. I have been struggling a lot lately and I have tried therapy and medication too. I have been struggling professionally I..e can't motivate myself to work and don't see a path to switch companies or teams due to visa and layoffs respectively. I was previously a top performer but this year I have barely done any work. I was always an extreme introvert growing up and had very few friends. My parents were in a different country growing up and I was raised by my grandparents. For almost all my life I suffered from crippling social anxiety and while I could do deep conversations - I struggled with small talk and many basic social cues and even find it awkward at times to say hi/bye to new people I meet. My family was lower middle class and we just had enough to make ends meet. I am doing better in that aspect now, and have accumulated some modest savings under 5 million which may be enough for me to settle down in some LCOL In terms of personal life, I didn't even try dating till I was 27 or so. I have been in 10+ relationships that lasted over 3 months or more. I find it hard to meet women I am interested in (intellectual, nerdy, and genuine) on dating apps. I am average height, below average face - I have a small birth deformity around my eye but otherwise I am reasonably fit and exercise almost daily. Some women I met liked my straightforward honesty , and humor. Some gave me feedback on some things they didn't like about me like having an extremely healthy diet , no desserts, no alcohol etc and some found me too honest. There is a part of my brain that is always thinking if I will ever find a suitable partner given my social anxiety and awkwardness and average looks. I am struggling to cope and I don't know how to deal with both my career and personal life anymore. I am constantly stuck in my own head with many not so positive thoughts. How can I come out of this state ? What can I do to solve some of these problems. Tc : 🥜 #dating #marriage #relationships #health #mentalhealth
Bro I really dislike these kind posts. Generally start with sad paragraphs, suddenly uses a humble brag of 5 million USD savings, again diverts the ending to sad and sympathetic. Just so done with these posts.
Trauma dumping on the internet
Dump 800k in EB5 and be happy.
You have so much money, find yourself ways to improve.
If you feel like chatting, DM me, in a similar struggle though not depressed
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