Hi Seattleites, As I was failing at Tinder/Bumble (swiping right on everyone and only going on like 4 dates a month), I was wondering: what is it like to feel desirable? Any tips on getting better at this dating thing? Is hitting the gym really this big of a life changer? Or are some men just born with a more attractive face? Is there something I can spend money on to look better? TC: 170k
What is your facial routine? A lot of men think that other men are naturally fresh but that’s (often) not true. Washing the face and applying some lotion is important. The act of massaging your face increases blood flow which is great for your face. Keeping your facial hair trimmed and nice is also important. You can do facial exercises to make your skin look tight and fresh. This basically enhances the muscles around jaw, cheekbones, and eyebrows giving a more manly look. Boxers often train their jaw to not get knocked out easily which is why boxers often look so manly. The most important steps is to get this into a routine and go to the gym 3 times a week. You have to do this long term because it takes months to see result from taking care of your face and going to the gym. Next step is to put on clothes that FIT. Talk to a tailor or about the fit of your clothes. Don’t dress like someone else, if you don’t like shirts then don’t wear it. Just wear something that fits and is you. Posture is a huge problem in the tech Industry. The arched back, short glutes, and forward rotated shoulders make us look feminine and shy. Open up the shoulders, straight back, open up your hips. Damn. I gotta run. That’s my 5 cents! Ciao!
⭐️ gold star for you. Thank you, doing needful on daily.
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ great response with actionable advice, thanks SANTA
Hitting the gym won’t hurt. Learning how to dress is a big one. For gods sake, even women find Steve Carrell attractive now that he knows how to wear tailored clothing. Head to Nordstrom, find a sales guy who looks cool, and plan on spending a couple g’s but he will hook you up. Oh and go to a real barber in the city and get a good haircut. Change it up because you probably currently have the sheepdog look goin. Get a 2 faded to a 1 faded to a skin fade on the sides, with some sort of style on top (could stay a little long, or go real short (finger length).
Steve Carrell was always attractive. Sense of humour goes a lonnnnnnggggg way
steve carell was attractive and fit! have you seen him in that office episode where he is wearing a tight shirt?!?!
The gym makes a good difference mostly only if you do it right. Regardless of whatever blogs or YouTube videos you've watched on working out, hire a personal trainer for 6 months +. You want to lay down super solid fundamental mind+body control, this is where a lot of the gym benefit to dating will come from. Instead of worrying about looking like a roided out gym addict most women/men want someone who's healthy enough to be in control of their body (full body posture).
You are such a beta it hurts
😂
Agreed. He needs to be a theta or at least a sigma. My best friend is a phi. I'm a gamma though.
Also depends on your political affiliation
4 dates per month? I get 1-2 dates per year thru tinder it's like pulling teeth
Okay that’s your first faux pas right there. Tinder uses a variation of the Elo ranking system that’s commonly used in chess, in order to rank your attractiveness. Swiping right on everyone => reduces rank.
So you're saying it only shows my profile to bottom feeders? Because I see plenty of people who I'd love to match with
It makes sense. Desirable people can afford to be more selective, so they incentivize that behavior. Have you ever told a prospective employer you had a pending offer—and see how they treat you differently? It’s a similar effect.
Women dig confident men. Build self confidence by acquiring skills, wealth, and improving looks.
You get confidence by being more successful with women not the other way around. You can’t fake confidence.
You can definitely fake confidence. Long enough to develop the real thing. Don't over do it.
What are you looking for? A new girl every night? A date every week through tinder is pretty good, most so far worse.
Emphasis on "a" date, not "the" date. I'd like to go out with women that I'm excited about, not those who happen to swipe right. Meeting women seems like an extremely arduous process for me given that 4 million people live in Seattle's metro area. Perhaps there are things I could do to improve that. But I'm also looking for stories from people who do get a new girl every night. What is it like? In more poetic words: Every day they shout and scold and go about their lives Heedless of the gift it is to be them If I was in their skin I'd treasure every instant
Hey OP. I’m out of the game now and I am not especially handsome but I used to have 4-5 dates a week. What is it like? Exhausting. And generally not exciting. In fact generally you start becoming numb to it and puts you in a bad mindset for finding the one. Don’t worry about it. Be honest with yourself in what you’re looking for in a partner, and be open to meeting that person in a form that you weren’t expecting (I know that’s broad. It can mean a lot of things) Going to the gym helps you be healthy, reduce stress, and feel better about yourself so that will help you generally but “going to the gym” does not get girls. It might get a few specific girls but it doesn’t help with a type or generally broadly help at all. Having money isn’t all that important to Seattle gals. Nobody I ever dated gave a shit when I made under 40k and they sure as shit didn’t care when I was making 300k. It DOES help you with interesting date ideas though. And down the road when you’ve established a relationship you can nonchalantly go on nice trips which she will appreciate.
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What should I spend it on though? Or do you just upload your W-2 on Tinder and dates come flying?
Women are attracted to men with $$$