How many messages do you exchange on the dating apps before asking them out?
I've been doing about 8-10 total - that is, 4 or 5 messages per person. This used to work 70% of the time 2 years ago but now 80% of the time the conversation dies right there or I'm unmatched. Usually I ask (drinks or coffee) and I give them my number so we have the option to either coordinate over the app or over text. Whichever they're more comfortable with. What am I doing wrong? Or is it something where somehow women are expecting dinner dates for the first date and I'm just getting weeded out by the entitled? DC area if it matters.
You get matches lol? Most guys don’t even get that
One of the first couple if I can help it. Otherwise what's the point?
5 messages? That’s like 90 seconds total. Women want to see that you can keep it up for a bit longer
People are rarely on the phone at the same time so usually 5 messages each is more like 1-3 days at least
People are always on the phone.
IMO this is about the right cadence IMO. Don't text too much. I refuse to do dinner dates on the first date - way too stiff. I prefer to do drinks at like 5 or 6 and if things go well, I have a backup reservation for dinner.
They need to screen you to make sure your not a creep, send them your IG
IMO, most aren’t looking for a pen pal. Chats over a few days are great but get that call/FaceTime going. Then a meet. You’re on the right track.
I started talking to someone recently and they asked me out to drinks after a few exchanges on the app I thought it was way too fast but I said yes anyways and pushed the meet up date to the next weekend to get to know them better. I wonder if it has to do with their age as they are a few years older than me mid 30s to exact. They also asked for my number which I said no. Don't feel comfortable sharing that until after we meet. They were OK with this otherwise it would have ended there.
Are you looking for a serious relationship?
I am but don't you think messaging for just 2 days and less than 20 messages is too early to meet in person? I want to take my time to get to know them first . I'm open to hear your perspective.
Funny opener, 1 retort, then make plans. Otherwise yep conversation never moves forward