If there is one advice I can give to y'all professionals from marginalised backgrounds - it is to marry early. Do not follow the lifestyle of your peers. They have privileges - race privilege, money, network, parents who attended college, majoritarian privilege. They are the FAANGs of this world. You are the scrappy startup. You need ALL the help you can get, and a partner is a great way to get a leg up in this world. I can't speak to women, but for the men - don't waste your 20s chasing women and taking it easy. Instead, marry, take on responsibility early and spend your 20s building an empire. Don't listen to influencers and conventional wisdom. All of them is by the privileged, for the privileged. Your situation is different.
What are “all the help” from a wife you are referring to?
Rajesh is having a quarter life crisis
Rajesh, believe it or not, does NOT come from a marginalised background, no matter what he writes in his college essay. Rajesh usually has a house, a car, educated parents, a well connected network. So this advice, in fact, does not apply to Rajesh.
I hope everyone who plays the victim card in life never becomes successful
This is actually makes a lot of sense!
All for getting married, taking on responsibility, and bucking conventional wisdom on that front. With that said, gotta love the never ending oppression olympics in the USA.
It gets worse every year.
The kids aspect was shown to be the single biggest contributing factor to generational poverty. Every extra year between 18 and 32 years of becoming a first time parents makes the odds much better for both parents and their offspring. This is amplified for women especially in countries with high poverty rates
For me having kids and a great wife made me more productive vs being single and playing video games
A good spouse is a good thing. The thing is, not too many people are emotionally mature as quickly as they are physically mature. It’s hard to build a relationship when both parties are emotionally immature. Sometimes in rare occasions people click and grow together, more often they don’t . Kids can put a strain on an already strained relationship in that case -both financial or mental. You are in effect a statistical abnormality. Good for you
With the mental health crisis going on in this world, odds of marriage lasting a lifetime is less than 50 pct. If someone is willing to take this gamble ( and sure that they themselves are built for marriage) go for it. Not everyone in this world is meant to be married
It's much, much, much easier to build an empire when you are single and not married.
How early? 5am?
Disagree. 1. You can have a loving and long-term relationship without being married. 2. Raising kids demands significant time, energy, and money, which can make it more challenging to achieve your goals. 3. Just because you found motivation to build an empire by having a family doesn't mean everyone will share that same sense of purpose.
And then lose half when they get divorced?
See, this is what I am talking about. Conventional wisdom. Don't listen to this. You need your own conventional wisdom. This doesn't apply to you. Because for y'all, the benefits of taking on responsibility early far, far outweigh any hypothetical situations like these.
Considering how many marriages end in divorce, bad advice.