Women on Blind: are you surprised by replies?
I’m reading through threads and Blind feels like the rest of the internet: misogynistic, hostile, rampant trolling (I contribute to this). The folks making these comments have known tech companies associated with them. Are you surprised by some of your peers? Do you find Blind useful? An example: a reply in the “Asian women” thread as the reason for their popularity as partners was due of their vagina size (not as politely put). That person was from Apple. More generally I’m having trouble finding Blind’s value proposition outside of hostile gossip. Maybe that’s all this app is and that’s OK?
I also read that post. While that particular comment was mean, there were so many nice comments too. Why did you pick that particular comment and blame the whole blind? That happens with men as well, people troll men too( and actually way more than women). Why is your question just for women? Trying to get unnecessary female sympathy? Being on blind is your choice, use it or delete it.
Hello Mystic13. This thread isn’t attacking you or downplaying your blight as a man. I respect that you too have issues that impact you. For this thread: I’m curious about women on Blind since from my unscientific survey they appear to be a small number and shrinking. In particular, if I extrapolate the negative responses towards women on Blind, in a meeting of 10 people at work, 1-2 will share these views. It never occurred to me that this was the reality women lived with at work, and I’m curious to learn more because that sounds like a shitty experience.
Thank you, OP. yes, to some extent this is our lives. On non tech forums you may get honest open dialog. In tech I'm seeing this less and less. Rather it's all I got my job because I'm a woman, I got promoted cuz I'm a woman, blah blah. Do these same men say it to my face? Not as often as it would seem from the warriors who post here. Edited because for some reason it uploaded a picture with my reply. Damn technology .
As a woman, yes the comments and trolling is surprising, and definitely doesn't align with the purpose of this app. I actually thought of quitting blind a while back because I came online for some useful info, then saw derogatory remarks, objectification, and trolling, especially on the sad posts. Having said that, blind does provide useful info too, that made me stay. Also, just because I may not see the trolling doesn't mean it's not happening. I pinged personally and offered help to several people who posted they need help or are depressed for whatever reason. Strangely, I only received responses when I introduced myself as a woman, which again depicted the shallowness of the posts.
What’s unfortunate is that people with depression feel very closeted - that they can’t come out and say they have it. Women, I’ve experienced, are much more empathetic and people of both genders are more willing to disclose that to a woman than a man.
Not just people with depression, even those who needed interview help, or mentioned they have had several rejects, didn't reply to me when I introduced myself as a guy. Such shallowness!
What should matter is the kindness and openness of the poster - not the gender.
why don't women objectify men back and call it even? why do they always have to complain?
Name checks out
Because they will get 20 personal messages, half of them calling them a slut and half hitting on them. Trust me.
You reap what you sow op. ATM you are sowing I’m better than you mentality. Women on blind generally seem to take the higher road and are non confrontational as I haven’t seen them posting inflammatory remarks to the extent men do. Then again I don’t read and hone in on this one comment someone made. You are picking a needle and generalizing it to fit your argument. Bad comes in all sizes, genders, races. So does good.
+1
Surprised? No. Disheartened? Yeah. And this thread is equally full of eyeroll material. :/
Disheartening is the right word.
Surprised - no. I've been on blind almost since the moment they opened it to the public, so at least since July... had to take a long break from the toxicity. Honestly it's opened up my eyes.... confirmed that I'm never moving to silicon valley... but also I've found the best and the worst of humanity here.... at rare times unexpected kindness and human decency, but most of the time its the "women are evil slutty objects" narrative. I'm on here to keep my ear to the wire, research compensation, good companies for women, and to get those tidbits and pieces of insider info i miss because I'm not "one of the boys".... .... and perhaps to ask someone to refer me to Pinterest one day... that's about the only way I'd go to CA. 😉
One thing surprising is guys are answering your question. Anyways as a female I agree. A lot of the responses are crude and have nothing to do with the question.
Plateaux - love your responses. You're one of the few I've noticed that keep some people in line.
Thank you, that is quite a compliment 😃
I've seen plenty of valuable threads and a lot more of the kind you describe. If you choose to predominantly/only look at the bad ones, you'll arrive at the conclusion you did. Perspectives. PS- I've seen plenty of terrible threads from people at all companies (including plenty from Amazon), so it'd help if it didn't seem like you're trying to single out any company in your post.
Definitely not an Apple specific example. Poisonous comments come from every tech company. I’m trying to reconcile how damaging it’d be to realize a subset of your peers have these views. The distinction being you may have assumed it was only kids on YouTube comments, now you KNOW it’s at least some of your peers too.
Sorry to be blunt but this "not in my family/friends/peers" mentality is simply foolish/ignorant. Unless there's evidence otherwise, you have assume that your group/circle is made of the same kinds/percentages of people that make up the rest of the world. To assume anything else is to live in wonderland.