how do you deal with people hitting on you @ work?
Do you confront them or what? Anyone experienced dealing with this while being able to continue working with these people? And yes I’ve mentioned to them that I’m in a relationship. TC 110k
Are you male/female?
Come on, what kind of question is that...
HOW DARE Y...oh wait
If they don't know you're in a relationship, tell them. Once you've already told them, remind them each time and ask if your bfgf can join. Or say a firm NO and walk away, go to the bathroom or grab a coffee.
Yeah it’s clear I’m in a serious relationship, and I’ve also been avoiding one person completely, but that has made it more awkward when I do see them. Looks like confrontation is the only way to go...
Wear a fake ring . Works like a charm
@pvtal I'm curious why you mentioned TC in your OP?
It's a local tradition
Hitting on you? Need to elaborate more on that. If someone is asking you out for the first time, you can't really complain this to HR. Kindly tell that person you're colleagues, you're not interested anything more than work related relationship; and you are not interested in anyone else since you're in a relationship. This explanation would make things crystal clear. If that person asks for the second or more, then you can take it to HR.
I like this advice the best. The thing is like you said, need more elaboration. How does OP know that someone isn’t just being super friendly? I have gotten misunderstood this way and it’s kinda awkward.
No offence amzn-blindly (honest!), but for every misunderstood friendly person there’s two who are using that guise to subtly harass people and trying really really hard for wish fulfilment. Sorry! But yes op can simply clarify that they are not comfortable, and need more space.
I hate that people have to use the “I’m in a relationship” excuse, they should t have to explain themselves and a simple I’m not interested should be enough. Sadly it isn’t. To ops point : is it a very clear ask out “let’s hang out let’s do x let’s go on a date”? That’s a bit easier you can be very blunt and say you are not interested and they should stop asking. If it’s them paying too much attention, hanging on to you, etc leaving room for ambiguity / plausible deniability (yes some sad people do this) the answer still is to confront them and say you’re not comfortable with the interactions and would strongly prefer they give you your space. You shouldn’t have to avoid someone. And after one warning, absolutely it is hrable and it should be hred.
Yeah it’s absolutely the plausible deniability space. Thanks, I’ll confront them
I say “way too much work - can I ping you when I am relatively free instead ? “. And then never ping them - ever!
Move to Amazon. I know they have super strict policy and trainings. Such harassment will rarely happen, if at all.
Doesn't matter of your male or female. If they are hitting on you, pull them aside. Be honest!!! Above all, be honest. It is respectful to their heart and yours. You can not feel bad if your honest and straight forward. Tell them you are not interested. Tell them it's becoming uncomfortable(assuming it is). Tell them that you are only going to ask them once. ( when you say it slow down your words, with tiny pauses between them. This is you telling them how serious you are so it needs to be slow, straight and hard) Than, ask them to "Please stop". Then set your expectations. Tell them how you want the relationship to go. Ask them to look at you and tell you what you said(exact wording will depend on your personality). Have them clarify it in their own words. Then tell them, thank you for listening and being so mature/adult about hearing me. This should leave no one insulated. So no relationship should go sideways. If anyone ask about it or anything just reaffirm it was a private conversation. This keeps gossip down and shows respect to the other.
Get evidence if possible, go to HR if they persist
Going to HR seems a bit extreme - I’m not being sexually harassed (only embarrassed for them / don’t want to be the subject of gossip)
Unwanted advances are also harassment https://www.eeoc.gov/laws/types/sexual_harassment.cfm