I met a guy and we hung out a couple times. He lives kind of far from SF but I sincerely like him and am quietly not seeing anyone else until I see things through with him. We’ve been texting but he’s pretty reserved and without seeing each other in person, how do I come up with things to share? How do I make him like me via text??!! Especially when dating apps so easily provide the next girl. Do I just keep sending fun little messages every couple days in order to stay on his mind? He responds right away and positively but it’s brief. What kinds of texts would pique your interest (no, not sexy pictures as I want to build a real connection). I am hardcore crushing over here, send help.
Show interest but don’t show too much interest. He should be thinking the same thing about you “oh she could easily find another guy if I let her go”
How to do this? What’s too much or not enough?
Try this. Instead of being sure to text super often and kind of showing your anxiety about losing him that way, do a few things. Text less often, but make it more powerful when you do. Try to set up some phone calls. Make bullshit reasons for them if you have o. Calling is so much more powerful than texting. Build it up so that you both want to see each other again. And when you do, don’t put out for a whiiiiiiile. The dating game is simple: guys try to make girls into sluts, girls try to make guys into cucks. Whoever wins the battle gets what they want
Try to not care about his perception too much and just b u. People dont respond if they are set on other girl. Youre doing fine
Be you!
Usually it’s the other way round, as a girl if we isn’t reciprocating he probably isn’t interested. I would suggest spending real time and suggesting you want to visit some place etc. if he likes you he will suggest that as a date.
Troll post. Guys in SF area just need you to be a 'girl' to be interesting enough. No, dating apps won't provide the next girl easily unless the guy is Bradley Cooper. The ratios are highly unfair, with even desi girls trying to woo white folks. The other reasons could be either physical: looks, race etc or ideological: staunch feminism vs rationalist, liberal vs radical, fear of being #metoo'd
Nope. Legit af. My girlfriends are telling me to move on to a guy who will be more gung ho for me. So I’m turning to the Wild West of Blind for advice.
Are you sure the reasons I listed do not apply? I fear you might need to tweak your lookout criteria if you really want to succeed. I am not asking you to change yourself, but change your criteria for example White/Greek God/6'2"/liberal/has a dog/reads a lot / 6 PACs/ 300K TC/not a playboy etc
Nudes usually work for me
😞 Please reread post
tell him you are interested and ask him if he wants to explore more... sometimes we waste too much time in nuances. If he is in as well he will say yes else cut your loss & move on knowing you tried In long scheme of things relationships are over rated
Find out about his interests and talk about that. Usually breaks the ice
What is “kinda far” from SF? Personally I’ve started to immediately lose interest if women start demanding I drive to see them because “the guy should make an effort” but never are willing to meet me halfway or anything. Ie, they live in SF but won’t meet me in San Mateo if I’m coming up from San Jose, or when I lived in SF and they were in Hayward same thing - wouldn’t meet me anywhere just always wanted me to do all the driving, still pay for the date, etc. I’ve even tried being like “yeah sure we can do first date near you and just take turns where we hang out, maybe Marina this weekend, Santana Row next weekend?” and they go “nah I don’t ever leave SF.” I’d imagine other guys have gotten the same type of responses at least I know some of my single friends have. So I’d say what we want to see in texts is effort or a willingness to share the work. Relationships take work and if we see early on that you’re not willing to work and just want us to do everything, it’s a turn off.
Good point. First date I met him halfway (something I have never done before) and we split the date. And I would definitely drive to meet him now (surprised I’m saying that now).
If he is not willing to take that much effort, don't expect anything in future. I used to fly 500 miles to just to have a sip of coffee with my crush, and while my boss used to drop 100 emails to fix those bugs. In short, that ain't the root cause, it's an secondary issue.
You should flirt and turn the conversation slightly sexual. Share pics where you are looking fine, but not nudes.
You think so?? I thought about this but didn’t know if he would think I was vain and image oriented.
Ideally fit it in somewhat naturally. But guys are visual, we like to look at women, prospective dates. We all want nudes, but maybe don't want to push it early on. But some sexy clothes shots would do, along with good conversation.
Tell him that you are hungry for him
I told him something like that when we hung out. I get the impression that he’s looking for a deeper connection and I want to show him that we could have that.