Help! After a 20 yr marriage, got divorced 2 years ago and have a healthy relationship with my ex because of our son. I ran into one of my ex’s friends recently. Not like her BFF, more of a distant friend and we really hit it off. We have been on a few “friendly” dates but no lines have been crossed yet. She is sooo much fun to be with and we click on so many levels that finally I feel like I can love again. She feels the same way. But but she is my ex wife’s friend. They talk every once in a while and like each other’s pics on insta. We are now super confused about next steps. I have a very healthy relationship with my ex. We don’t talk about our relationships and etc but due to my feelings for her friend, I know once we get more serious, I’ll most likely end up marrying her. Are we doing something wrong? I’ve been dating ever since my separation and I have yet to find anyone who makes me feel the way her friend does. What should I do? TC: 340K
Go for it, but tell your ex first. If she finds out some other way you'll be accused of hiding it from her and it'll be used as a weapon in some future argument.
The thing is: if I tell her now, it’s too soon and nothing has happened yet. If I tell her once we’re like super serious, then it will be too late I guess.
Maybe tell her I’m considering dating Sarah?
YOLO 🤘
That’s would work if there was no kid involved. But yes, YOLO!!!
If you feel that strongly, you should go for it but make sure your girlfriend is ready to lose her friend over this. It’d be a bit creepy to expect your ex-wife to be comfortable with this. You, of course, should be respectful of your ex-wife by telling her soon - once you know your girlfriend is ok with it. Tough situation, but connections like the one you described can be hard to find post-divorce. One more thing, be ready for this to be a family story... Your family and friends might always think of this as tacky move or a joke. If it’s worth it, you should still do it. (Maybe your family is nicer than mine would be)
I think she is okay with losing her. She just doesn’t want her to hate her. Besides, if we do get married, she will be part of my sons life.... I can already see all the drama unfolding. But I don’t want to tell my ex now because nothing has happened between us yet. Like we connect on all levels but we haven’t done anything physically yet. I want to be sure we are also okay in that department before opening it to my ex. So maybe I should go for it, and if things get serious then tell my ex but shift the times a bit so it seems we are just starting?!!! Idk And yeah, I already know we’ll be a family story but I don’t care about that.
She might hate her... that would be fair... but she might also love to see you together with someone she likes. If she is upset, most people get over that kind of thing in time. It’s just really odd and hard to share the intimacy of a marriage with a friend - “we both had the same husband”. You would have the power to make your ex look bad to her friend etc. but it sounds like you respect her and wouldn’t do that. It seems like a good idea to only tell your ex once you’ve made sure it’s a connection on all levels and then flub the dates a bit so she feels respected. It’s nice to see someone being so thoughtful of everyone involved in a tough situation. You seem like someone who could effectively navigate a complicated scenario like this and make everyone feel ok about it.
I see a threesome just around the corner for you...
Pathetic
edit: 3-sum
Is your ex seeing some one? If so may be a double date? But sure break the news first.
Have no idea. Our deal is only tell the other about these things if we are introducing them to our son. I guess we should’ve added another clause about dating our friends 😂
Sign of things to come
Haha. If this doesn’t convince me, nothing will
Have you kissed or fucked her yer? Serious question
"No lines have been crossed yet"... "I feel like I will most likely marry her" 😅 might propose mid-first kiss
“Might propose mid first kiss” 😂
Jeff?
Damn!!! Can’t even fake my identity by using a google account
Go for it, don't forget to post in this thread what Happened later.. lol
If you are divorced, what’s the problem in dating her? You both are adults and are free to do whatever you want
We have a son together. So the more civil the better. Plus there will be many occasions where we will all be in the same room (birthdays, etc)
Then talk to your ex and let her know your situation and ask her opinion. She won’t say no and it will solve your problem. I hope so.