Long story short - both me and wife work in SF Bay Area and I think after 5 years, I’m over this place. We spend more time sitting in traffic than going places. Pay ridiculous state tax and starting this year - won’t be able to deduct that in tax returns as well. For the amount we spent on buying a home, we could practically buy a McMansion in many other cities in the country. Wife is a badass engineer, graduated from a Top20 US MS program and works for an epic company. Whenever I try to bring up the subject of a move, she claims she won’t find such meaningful work elsewhere and the weather is not as great. And I’m like - a. That same company has offices in many cities across US (if you don’t want to leave them), b. There are many others doing equally important and meaningful work. As for the weather, I don’t remember when was the last time we went anywhere ’outside’ in the Bay Area so how does it matter what’s the weather outside? Home > Daycare > Office and back again. I’m dreading what happens when school will start, then there’ll be one more reason not to move. I’d love to be at a place where we can both find jobs and have a better quality of life.
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Amen to that man!
I want to move too but too scared to leave all friends and family behind. I don’t want to get alone
She is the one wearing pants !
Wtf!
Peer pressure .. the chance they miss out on what everyone is getting keeps most people from making such a change. You could try to reverse psychology that ... Something along the lines of "isn't it nice to be in an area where everyone is doing exactly what we are doing", "sticking out is for losers", ...
Yes, I suspect that’s definitely one of the stronger pull factors of the Bay Area.
Where would you move?
Irvine, Seattle, Portland, Austin (not a fan of the heat though), Boston. And at the risk of sounding like a money-pinching parent: Dallas and Phoenix (perhaps the best public schools in the country)
I would take Boston out. People are pretentious in the tech industry. Moved back to where I came from.
Who is holding her back. Convince him to come with you?
Did you try to find this?
Not only could you buy a mcmansion with the money youd spend here in the home, but you could just retire in Cambodia! But would that really make you happy? Why not try to minimize the negatives - perhaps move as close to work as possible, and find work in a place close to home? Plenty of companies around here, in different parts of the bay, that will have a job for you.
Yup doing that, interviewing so that hopefully commute is reduced a bit. But still - doesn’t it feel odd that we are overpaying for everything here? Agreed salaries are good to support, but that also means we need to be in this rat race much longer.
According to my math, even with all taxes, etc - the rate of monthly savings is higher than it would be anywhere else, not to mention the opportunities we get here. My advice - spend a few extra $$ on a smaller house, but with short commute (I'm 14-25 minutes door to door), rather than a larger house in Oakland, where you will waste your life away sitting in traffic. Reduce commute time, then see if you still want to move.
You can't, so get a new wife.
Might as well burn my fingers, grind my teeth, go bald, put on 20 pounds, get fake ID from dark web and start afresh in North Dakota, no? 🤣
This. 100% this.
She's right. Just make more money so you don't have to commute and the bay is great.
By taking her on vacation/holidays to other areas and showing her the pros!
Did that. Epic response: no one comes to know about a city in 3-4 days! 🤦🏻♂️
By taking her on vacation/holidays to other areas for about a month each and showing her the pros!