Risk it with gold diggers?
I just hit 30 and believe I've hit "fuck you money" over the past few years through some businesses that I've started. However, I'm wondering if it's worth the risk to show a little bit of wealth purely to attract some female attention. Sounds so stupid, I know. I'm just shocked at how difficult it is to date, or even find anyone to date, especially in the Bay area. Usually when I actually get a chance to talk to a girl, it goes well, but just meeting people in general seems to be impossible here. Even in dating apps, I get maybe 1 match every 2 or 3 months? I've gotten great feedback from female friends and coworkers about my profile and approachability in general, but obviously I'm doing something wrong lol. I don't think I'm a terrible looking guy and have no issues talking to people as I'm currently in Sales, but have been single for over 2 years now. I've only had long term girlfriends (2-4 years) in the past that all would have worked out, but I ended up moving away and putting my career first. I'm now worried I'll never find anyone. A lot of people I know are married and have kids. I don't want to wait too long and be a creepy old 40 yo dating a 20 something, but at the same time, I REALLY don't want to date a used up divorcee with kids. Probably the same girls who ignored me in my 20s. I don't know. TLDR: 30 and single for 2 years, have no luck attracting anyone, should I try to flaunt more money at the risk of attracting gold diggers? If I shouldn't, is there a time or age that I should? Sexually and emotionally frustrated. TC: 900k-1.2M variable
No show off... See "crazy rich asians"
The character already had a girlfriend though, which is great. I guess my issue is getting that girlfriend in the first place haha.
Then try to date girls with tc higher than you or who are from well off family enjoying life on daddy's money. They won't give damn about your TC
How did you get to that TC situation. I'll help you with the gf problem all the way with that intel lol
+1 get me into Medallia making that TC and I'll arrange plenty of dates.. Haha (Presumably this TC is a third Medallia pay and 2/3 outside sources..) In real response to question, no I would not spend just to try and flaunt to women. Bay area simply sucks for hot females. Keep cracking at it. I got married late 30s had a kid even later and all is fine. You're 30 man, that is nothing, long way to go. There are specialized sites for higher level chicks you just gotta do some research. That being said many of my friends are married to girls off Match.com or even POF. It's like sales... throw out a lot of spam mails and qualify hard...
Thanks man, that gives me hope. And yes, you're right--nothing special about Medallia haha. It only accounts for approximately 15-20% of my TC. To answer Google's question though, it's a mix of real estate and consulting.
SV is tough for guys
If you want just to get laid - show off. Bimbos are waiting. If you want a real relationship- don’t show off. There are a lot of sneaky people out there who would try to date you for your money, but at the same time making it look like they don’t care about it.
Sorry bro. With the type of women we have these days it hard to find someone who will love you for who you really are. And your TC is part of the problem. You should find a woman who loves you regardless of your TC, IMHO your best bet is to stay humble and normal and find someone. Though don’t stop yourself from getting a Tesla and a condo.
Haha ya, definitely splurged on a few things and it was exactly that. A Tesla and a condo lol. Though, it's nice because everyone here has a Tesla so it blends in well and no one knows if the condo you're in is yours or if you're renting.
Move. Bay Area sucks for heterosexual male.
Or heterosexual males in Bay Area suck.
Out of curiosity what type of businesses have you started that make so much money?
If I'm trying to get a signal off of just this post and be as brutally honest as I can, I'm not sure you have a reason for girls to want to come to you. You're talking about how you're approachable and successful, but not what makes you interesting or worth spending time with. Obviously that might just have not been the thing you thought to be in the post, but still worth considering. Being a nice, friendly guy is the baseline requirement to play the game, not enough for anyone to care. Why would a girl want to spend time with you? Do you have interesting hobbies that girls that you're into would want to participate in? Like, are you a dabbling musician who's into musical girls, or into hiking and outdoorsy girls, etc? Are you really into philosophy and want a girl who is into having deep conversations? Are you exceptionally passionate about tech and want someone who shares that? If you just optimize around getting "a girl" there's nothing really to do there. If you don't make polarizing decisions to filter towards being particularly interesting to a subset, then you will be uninteresting to everybody. As the only thing that is generally applicable no matter who you're after, however vain it is, have you worked on your aesthetic? Like do you go to them gym and stay ballpark 10% bodyfat, and do strangers compliment you on your style on the street? If not, that's an area to invest in. It's definitely better to improve your look than to do the run around, flash cash and then spend the rest of your life with it being reasonable to be paranoid of the motives of anyone you meet after starting that. You don't want to fall for a girl and then battle with the realization that she doesn't actually care about you and is just using you after you've already tangled your lives together.
Yes, totally agree. 100%. And thank you for your genuine feedback. I didn't post about personal details about myself because I didn't want this to be a dating ad lol, but I totally get what you're saying. I think what I struggle with the most is exactly what you said. I don't have a good way of demonstrating value or intrigue to a random person right off the bat. I like to think that I'm interesting, sure, but how do you convey to someone you've lived in 6 countries, or traveled to over 40? Or that you're passionate about the business you've built? Or that you love hiking and skiing? I do on dating apps, but I don't think people read the bios or care for travel pics. I think, like you correctly mentioned, I need to get out and socialize more with people that enjoy what I enjoy doing. My problem is that a lot of my hobbies are individual 😂💔 As for aesthetics, yes. I was a D1 athlete in my former years and have always strived to maintain that physique. Definitely not the same, but close. Overall though, I really appreciate your feedback. I guess I could wear fancier more stylish clothes, but doesn't that fall into flaunting? Iunno haha.
Stylish != crazy expensive Sounds like you have all the core personality traits, except maybe charisma. But that’s also hard to believe if you’re in sales. Honestly something doesn’t click, do you live deep in the Bay? If so at least move to SF and find a job in SF if you still want a day job.
If you’re looking for something long-term, I wouldn’t.