Tech_babe here
My husband makes significantly less than me. I’ve known him since grad school. I graduated and got good job right away. My husband had good internship , then became perm, then laid off. It’s been down hill from there with employment just constant lay offs and false hope. We did taxes and I contributed 220k while my husband 36k. I was in complete shock how little he made. I take care of all major bills which is becoming exhausting. Lately I’ve been feeling resentful as we never go anywhere or do anything because lack of money. If we do anything, I’m paying and planning. I’m starting to feel very limited and restrained as I just want to be and enjoy life. All I do is work and stare at the walls of this house. My husband is gentle and kind. I know he’s trying but just not enough . Sometimes I fantasize of being single and how much easier life would be. What should I do!? Is divorce an option? What Would I say? My mental has really taken a hit since February. Been living four consecutive years like this.
Now you know what it's like being a men... I'm with you, my girl stays home and never work.
Divorce
Have you and your husband ever even talked about how you felt? If you don’t know what to say, I’d show him this post. I’d say let him know how you’re feeling first to give him a chance to act, before you consider divorce.
If you have no kids …I would say talk to a lawyer and explore your options. If it wasn’t for his TC, considering all the other factors, is he the partner that you want. Weigh it all out. TC can change with the right opportunity …but everyone deserves to be happy. Figure out why you got married in the first place, if those things are not there anymore …it will not get better
Also, not pull out the sexist card, but my spouse does not make anywhere near what I make, and has been without work for multiple sprints, but it has never impacted our marriage. We have TONs of issues …but I never looked at our W2s and considered separation. Food for thought
lol did you say sprints ?
A man would never make this post about his wife
In heterosexual relationships, why don't men expect women to contribute more equally financially?
It’s possible at lower levels. But I could never make as much as my husband because he has a professional degree (not in tech). With a kid, it makes no sense for me to go back to school. When is the last time you knew a woman who made over $500k salary a year? I know none.
Clearly a larp. Get back to work Rajesh
Figure out what is happiness to you and learn to motivate and have patience. You have lot of options at your disposal and which one to pursue is dependant on what you want ? Enjoying life is different for different personality so without lying to yourself write it down on a paper as to what truly happiness means to you You will find your answer :)
Good advice. Skips the "how to" part and I'm all ears if you have more step by step to do this. Overall, I'm glad that I've colleagues who are this smart!! :)
Life is hard for men these days. Get high TC, women will say you are not spending time with them. Get low TC, women are still not happy. Women want to be independent yet dependent? Its so confusing. If you have a higher TC it is natural it should be you who is planning/paying isn't it? He would be doing otherwise right? Think about it this way, would you have thought of divorce if he had higher TC than yours? Would he have thought of divorcing you on the grounds that you make less money? Men never have a problem with their female partners having less TC. But it sure is amuzing to see women have a problem with men with less TC and divorce is even in question. Ultimately, if you love him, TC is just materialistic. If you don't, that's a different story. Peace.
Because women breadwinners still do all of the housework. The least a man can do is contribute more financially.
> Because women breadwinners still do all of the housework All married people I know share housework. And every men I know believes housework should be shared equally if both people work. You probably have been meeting shitty guys if you think this.
I’m mostly curious why you titled this post “tech babe here” 🤣🤡
Divorce and marry a Rajesh.